Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Tradition Tuesday: SEC Gunslingers Invade AFC West (well, the two teams that matter, anyway)
















Editor's Note: The rough focus of this blog is the rivalry between the Kansas City Chiefs (represented by Bankmeister) and the Denver Broncos (championed by Cecil and Old No. 7). It may seem unfair that it's two vs. one, but once KC gets that second Super Bowl we'll even out the delegation.

Seven years ago we started The Tradition, in which Broncos fans travelled out to the Truman Sports Complex with their team, and I returned to the Rocky Mountains with mine. We tailgate, we talk massive amounts of shit, our wives occasionally get assaulted by rival fans, and we almost always watch the visiting team lose. It's a grand old time.

Here at the HoG, we're going to keep The Tradition alive all year long with Tradition Tuesday--a weekly state-of-the-rivalry address.


Thus, we have installment two of Tradition Tuesday.

There are some interesting things to keep in mind about this post. One would be that I'm wasted. Two would be that I struggled, for literally hours, to get images of Brodie and Jay that were actually the same size. It, as you can plainly see, was not possible. My hope was to avoid sophomoric comments like, "See, our QB's picture is bigger, thus he's better."

Not that I would ever anticipate such a statement from either of my colleagues, but whatever. The point of today's Tradition Tuesday post is to examine the scary what-ifs of this upcoming season in the esteemed AFC West, a.k.a. the only division in the league that really counts for anything. As a whole, we know that the Art Shell's club --wha'? he's not the coach anymore? -- will fuck things up. Somehow. It doesn't matter how disgraceful your club was last year, or how impressive your franchise used to be. Bottom line=you still suck.

Moving on. Norv Turner will achieve tremendous success as head coach of the San Diego Chargers. How could you not? It won't be good enough, though.

This division, as always, will come down to Kansas City-Denver football. I know -- I didn't forget that the Bolts went 14-2 last year. Trust me. It was their thing. They had 'roids and luck on their side. But they also had Martyball. Bad times. I speak from experience, mind you.

The aim of today's post is to look at the young quarterbacks of these two fine franchises. On the one hand, you have a fan base that, as of day one of the 2006 season, was calling for its QB's head. If you're not sure who that guy is, allow me to assure you that he is the
king of Classville. Another top-notch signing by the In-Com-Plete franchise. And let me assure you that he led them. Oh, he led them far. And by far, I mean into the depths of the fifth-biggest drubbing one franchise has ever seen in conference title/world championship matchups. In case you didn't get that, it was one team's fifth ass beating in a big, big game.

Let's pause.

They've been to seven conference title games. In two of them, they advanced, and won a little something we like to call the Super Bowl. Those two times were also back to back. My Chiefs have been in three of said conference championship games, and won two, one of which resulted in a world title. Yes, dinosaurs roamed the earth then, cars hadn't been invented, and the team drank a primitive version of Gatorade. Please, take a moment to fill in your own asterisks. They, however, never had their asses handed to them. Except for Super Bowl I. A 25-point defecit doesn't equate to braggin' rights. But, oh, how I've gotten off track.

We're talking about the upcoming season. And we're talking about young quarterbacks.

Initially, the aim of this post was to compare Jay Cutler's stats at Vanderbilt against Brodie Croyle's stats at Alabama, and find a skewed, totally biased way of proving Croyle's ability/edge over Cutler's. Let's not waste our time, though. Cutler's a stud. He's got a
rocket laser arm and is totally set for success. Brodie Croyle has broken every bone in his body, strained every muscle, and is just plain too small to even get out of bed in the morning without hurting himself. So the matchup is obvious. Cutler's better than Croyle.

Let's look into the upcoming season. Broncos Head Coach Mike Shanahan made a switch many
Denver fans hoped he would make earlier than he did. Chiefs/Broncos day in Denver was ridiculous. Some Broncos fans screamed for Cutler --again, this was week two -- while others screamed at the screaming fans for such insanity. In the end, they were all on the same page. Mr. Vanderbilt got the nod, and almost led his team to a playoff berth.

In Kansas City, Croyle only saw mopup duty. Talk about
pretty. Oo, boy. So the edge is obvious. Shanahan made the change, not to make the playoffs last year, per se, but to win the Super Bowl. He didn't specify which one, but that matters little. Come opening day this year, if Kansas City Head Coach Herman Edwards decides that Brodie Croyle is the starting quarterback of the Kansas City Chiefs, his aim to win the AFC West could be in trouble. We'll now remember Kansas City's own quarterback controversy of last year.

That issue appears over as the Chiefs look to trade Trent Green, having signed Damon Huard to a new contract. All signs, however point to Croyle being the '07 starter, pitting the former SEC rivals against one another again. Cutler has the edge, having started NFL contests already, and if rumor holds true, Croyle can't stay healthy.

We shall see...

2 comments:

Unknown said...

A few dudes standing around a grill in Denver doesn't count as tailgating. There's no damn tailgating at INVESCO, dude. They wouldn't know tail if it bit 'em in the ass.

However, they DO have nice heated-indoor concessions with full bars and multiple TVs. This suits their ever-growing Yuppy population well. I like that feature, so that when I visit INVESCO I don't actually have to watch that god-forsaken franchise take cheap shots on the opposing D-Line.

Denver, man? That ain't tailgatin'.

blairjjohnson said...

Ah, shit. I forgot what I was going to say. Oh, yeah. Now, I remember. Daaaaaaaammmmn!