A Buehrle Effort

I came home from dinner last night and flipped on the tube. Randomly, my TV was tuned to whatever Extra Innings channel the Rockies had been on the night before, and that channel last night was carrying the White Sox and Rangers. The game had just ended, and players were a-hootin' and a-hollerin' and spraying beer on one another.

The Wife asked what was going on, as this was not normal postgame behavior on a cold April night. I speculated that someone might have just thrown a no-hitter, and sure enough, Mark Buehrle had just accomplished the task. Even more impressive, he faced the minimum and very nearly hurled a perfect game. In the fifth, Buehrle walked Slammin' Sammy Sosa and then picked him off first base.

I'm very bummed that I missed the game, for a couple of reasons. One is that I am the world's biggest jinx of no-hitters, and until Anibal Sanchez's gem last season I had never seen the end of such a game live. Normally, when I catch wind of the feat, I'll flip the game on and within a few pitches the first hit drops in.

More significantly, I can't even imagine how entertaining it would have been to have Kenny "The Hawk" Harrelson call a no-hitter. He exclamates strikeouts with a lightning-quick "He-Gone!" When the White Sox hit a home run, his dopey yet endearing call is "You Can Put It On The Board...Yes!!!" Buehrle K'd eight Rangers, and the Pale Hose lofted three jacks, so it surely was a feast of The Hawk last night.

Anyway, congratulations to Beuhrle. He's pitched like shit the last year, is in the walk year of his contract, and is a well-known Cardinals fan. Since St. Louis is bombing hard and their pitching staff blows, he'll probably cash in this one game for $30-plus million, even if he sucks the rest of the year. Well played, sir.