My Sports Life is a Rock Song: "Get on the Good Foot"

"Said the long-hair hippies and the afro blacks, they all get together across the tracks, and they party. On the good foot."

That's right. Welcome, welcome, welcome. Welcome to installment number two of "My Sports Life is a Rock Song." And like I said last week, in this feature's debut, it doesn't have to necessarily be rock, boys and girls. In fact, this week, in case it wasn't obvious already, the theme is soul. And soul -- also in the vein of plainly apparent -- is a good thing. And like my professional-sports-blogging colleage pointed out this morning, these are indeed heady times in KC. The Jayhawks look to knock off ol' GW tomorrow night in San Antonio, and the Royals...well, just see for yourself. (Editor's Note: Remind me to change that link, should they fall from their first-place stronghold.) There's lots to cover though, so let's get to it. Right after the "Read More" link, of course.

There we are. Much better. So, when everyone and their uncle is done circle jerking about some dumb calendar, I's ready to talk some sports. Like, say tonight, when we get into the bottom part of the rotation, with John Bale facing Scott Baker. This is when things should get interesting. The trio of Gil Meche, Brian Bannister, and Zach Greinke was able to mow through a powerful Detroit Tiger lineup. And that fucking ruled. Baker notched nine Ws for the Twinkies last year, while Bale hasn't started a game since 2003. Then, on Saturday, Trey Hillman's hijinks have tweeked what we anticipated to be the five-man gig. That is, Meche will take the mound (against Livan Hernandez) again, and fifth-spot man Brett Tomko, who came in for some middle relief on Monday, will get his first start on Sunday (against none other than the Boofmeister himself). After that of course, Rustoleum's Yankees come to town for opening day at The K. Until then, however, there is much left to prove for this quintet of hurlers.

In hoops news, Bill "I like toupees on my" Self ventures into the Final Four for the first time tomorrow night. And he faces none other than former KU Head Coach Roy Williams. And that game should be a barnburner.

I'll admit: I'm nervous as hell for this contest to get here, and get over with, KU victorious, of course. The Lone Reader, along with new commenter Vintage Pancho, tried to convince me over beers the other evening that the championship game on Monday is a bigger match than tomorrow's tilt. I disagree. Yes. It's been 20 years since the championship found its way through the Phog, and yes, many years later, Roy outright lied to the world, saying he'd never leave Lawrence, and of course he left and quickly won a championship with Matt Dougherty's recruits. But the championship game isn't here yet. Round one of the Final Four is.

And it's like this: In 1988, the 'Hawks started off the tourney in Nebraska, then went to Detroit, just before coming to the center of gay-calendar production to claim their thrown. This year, they went through Omaha and the Motor City as well. In 2003, Roy reached the championship game, and on April 2, he was faced with a swarm of media, demanding to know whether or not he'd leave to fill Dougherty's vacancy, in his home state, at his alma matter of the University of North Carolina. Two days ago (Note: Also April 2, for those of you who've yet to purchase your gay calendar), Sean Sutton, allegedly under tremendous pressure, resigned from Oklahoma State, which, surprise, is Self's home state, and alma matter. Self is handling the press well, the intelligence gained from Williams' blundering, and the behavior of dumbfucks like this guy, examples of what not to do. He claims, in his true-to-form clammering style, that his focus is on the title.

So Roy's had his cake and eaten it, too. It's only fitting, and kharmically correct, that he get eliminated from contention -- this time with his own recruits -- by the bleeding Jayhawks. It wasn't until today, either, that I truly felt solid about this game. Well, I mean, this helped.



A lot. So, uh, thanks to Cecil's favoritest magazine.

But, I've got to throw this in there, too, regardless of how calendar gay, or impossible, it might sound to some. In '88, I watched that "Danny and the Miracles" championship with my mom. And it was amazing. A few years prior, however, I watched some post-season KU basketball at the Lone Reader household. With us then, was the lady written about here. As mentioned in that post, she was a special lady. And she loved the crimson and blue like no other. She'll be with us on Saturday, as we whisper sweet rock chalks into Roy's ears.

And it will be then, and only then, that we may discuss the championship game.

So, it's time to get on the good foot. It's time to bring this Royals fever to a boil. It's time to Beak 'Em, Hawks. It's time to let those funky horns blow, dig deep into that funky bass, skank with that popcorn guitar riff, and "take care of business, sister, I'm your fella." On the good foot.