Does This Look Like A Ballfield?

I'm a big geek when it comes to ballparks, so this stunt they're pulling Saturday in LA is interesting, at least to me. The Dodgers and Red Sox are playing a three-game exhibition series starting tonight, with two of the games being played at Chavez Ravine.

Saturday's game, however, will be at the Coliseum. Yes, that Coliseum, where Olympics have been staged, USC plays, and the Raiders once roamed (saw my first regular-season game there, matter of fact). The Dodgers played there for a few years after they moved from Brooklyn and their park was under construction, and they rigged up a 42-foot-high screen 250 feet from home to account for the goofy dimensions.

Tomorrow, that screen will be closer and higher, and Manny will take aim and pose. Take a look at this cool interactive graphic, and stay tuned after the jump for another Lineup Against The Wall, Dodger-style...

I don't know what Joe Torre will do, but if he's smart LA will sport a lineup like this:

1. Rafael Furcal SS
2. A second baseman
3. Matt Kemp LF
4. James Loney 1B
5. Andruw Jones CF
6. Russ martin C
7. Andre Ethier RF
8. A third baseman
9. A pitcher

You'll notice a few things here that may look a little weird. Porn-Stache Kent and Nomar aren't around, but that's because they're old, brittle and will most likely start the year on the DL.

The other veteran I've benched is Juan Pierre, because he's really an awful baseball player. Check out this Fire Joe Morgan sendup of this Bill Plaschke piece for an idea of the shittiness of Pierre and the myopia concerning his nonexistent talent. Look, I like Pierre. I liked what he did for the Rockies and the Marlins, and he was once an exciting player. But he can't hit a baseball and he throws like a penguin. And penguins don't have thumbs.

Play the kids. The kids are awesome. Few clubs have the kind of young core that the Dodgers have, and it's a waste to make Ethier sit behind Pierre. There's some dude named DeWitt who can play third and a second-sacker that goes by Hu, but Hu gives a fuck? The rest of these guys can hit.

One final note, about Andruw Jones. The two-year, $36 million deal he signed was one of the most widely ridiculed in baseball, but I thought it was brilliant. LA is a team that could easily win the NL this season. They needed a centerfielder to replace Old Penguin-Arm, and they needed a slugger to pick up the slack that Porn-Stache and Nomar invariably leave when they rip groin muscles from the bone and wash trucks. Andruw had the worst contract year in the history of baseball, when he showed up weighing about a Barkley and a half and he hit Pierre's weight. By giving him a short-term deal, he still has the incentive of playing for one more big payday (we forget this, but he's only 30). I expect Andruw to have a decent year at the plate and hustle his beer gut around the outfield.