The Quest for the Cup: Ladies and Gentlemen, The Los Angeles Ducks of Anaheim

To All the Hockey Naysayers: If you didn't even flip on the contest once think last night's game/championship celebration/post-game coverage was anything shy of phenomenal, feel free to go play in California traffic make yourself a knockwurst sandwich.

'Cause it kicked lots of Canadian ass. Let me break down just how.

The coverage: Prior to the first drop of the puck, I told Old #7 (who was feigning a mild case of enthusiasm over watching) to monitor the giant case of suck Brett Hull acquired when he made the transition from player to former player in da' boof.

To my surprise, he didn't do half bad. Jesus, he's full of himself, though. Someone must've told him that, in between Bill Clement and Ray "Chicken Parm" Ferraro, he might want to not sound like a complete moron. Ferraro, by the way, has gradually shed concussion symptoms in the three years since his retirement.

I believe he's eclipsed the Steve Young bar, something the former 49ers quarterback has yet to accomplish. Man, he (Ferraro) knows his stuff, though.

The contest: All three periods yielded sheer Anaheim domination. They stormed the ice with an fierce determination and manhandled Ottawa in the first. To the Senators credit, they re-grouped and put together a decent second, albeit defenseman Chris Phillips goal in his own net didn't do the Canadian squad many favors. That said, he was pressured behind his own netminder, and, when forced to hustle, his stick got caught up in goalie Ray Emery's skate.

Nevertheless, the tally was the game-winning goal.

The third period showed few signs of a Senator surge. Daniel Alfredsson was the exception. His loose puck scoop/incredible short-handed tally under pressure should've given Ottawa some juice. Anaheim, however, wasn't having it. Less than a minute later, and still on the power play, Anaheim answered.

The proverbial nail in the coffin came via the Ducks' captain/now four-time cup winner Scott Niedermayer. He careened a puck and rifled it on net, a goal Travis Moen got credit for. It was pretty sweet to see Niedermayer, who was the only previous cup-winner, get to hoist it first, then pass it off to his brother Rob. That was not the feel-good story, though.

The feel-good story: Teemu Selanne. Period. This has consistently been, sleepy as it may be to everyone else, my favorite thing about post-season hockey over the course of the last six years. It all started of course with Operation 16W, which, you may recall, involved getting this guy a much-deserved chance at the hardware. Dominik Hasek got his the following year with Detroit, and I'm sure there was someone important on the 2003 New Jersey squad that won it for the first time.

Back to teams and players that matter, though. Dave Andreychuk got his in '04 with the Lightning, Rod Brind'amour, his with the Hurricanes last year, and Selanne was this year's recipient. Fourteen years ago, Selanne was drafted by the Winnipeg Jets, became a Duck, logged some time with the San Jose Sharks, was acquired by the Colorado Avalanche, and finally returned to Anaheim where his original jersey number (eight) will be retired.

Insert the proverbial post-season interrogation regarding whether or not this was his last year. He, naturally, couldn't say. I don't think it will be. Either way, it was damn awesome to see that man hoist the cup.

The Conn Smythe: I'm stoked that Neidermayer got it. Really I am. But, like the tendencies in other sports for such awards, I think it's bullshit how often a member of the winning team gets handed some trophy just because they're on the winning team. I would've given it to Alfredsson, the Sens captain. In my estimation, no player from any team contributed more to his squad's success. That's how the stuff should be determined, but HoG readership stopped paying attention 17 paragraphs ago.

The Post-Game Celebration: I hope someone was fired last year when they cut away from coverage like three minutes into it. This year's was 1000 times better. So, good job, you we're-not-covering-'til-January-and-even-then-it'll-only-be-like-once-a-week confounded network.

The Hatred: This is not for you clowns that diss hockey. This is for those that follow it. Or anyone in between that has an idea. Why is NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman so despised? Seems to me that any professional sports commissioning job would be very under-appreciated. I don't get it. This Web site is just a grain of sand in the beach of Bettman hatred out there. Someone please fill me in.

That's it for HoG hockey coverage for some time, I guess. I know. Boo hoo, right? Whatever.