We Are Hot Chicks Wednesday: Who's The Boss?

Last week I attended an editorial meeting of the House of Georges, and by attended a meeting I mean that I listened to Bankmeister yell at me on the telephone about my shitty writing, lack of quality cursing, and failure to reference the Kansas City Royals in every baseball post. He's a big-time ball buster, that guy. At one point, however, the phone went dead and I thought that either A.) I hadn't paid my bill, or B.) I was dreaming about the finale of The Sopranos.

As it turns out, neither scenario was factual. Banky was still there, he was just transfixed by a certain photo of a certain lady we all know awfully well. Hell, we grew up with her.

With Leather posted about a contest in which Alyssa Milano is going on a "date" with one lucky fan as part of a promotion for her line of women's MLB apparel and, fuck, who really cares? It was just an excuse to run a photo of a Hot Chick in her underwear, and that excuse is now my excuse to run several more:

Alyssa is well known for allowing a staggering number of celebrities to penetrate her various orifices, including the Coreys, marginal hockey player Wayne McBean, and many, many pitchers (Glavine?).

I heard a radio interview with Alyssa a few weeks back in which I learned a few things. One is that she has a freakishly husky voice, so low and guttural that you wonder if she gargles gasoline and broken glass to wash the taste of pitcher cock out of her mouth. Two is that she claims to have never slept with Leinart, that they're "just good, good friends." If true, that's very good for the health of Alyssa's high-risk vagina. You see, Leinart has been linked to the sloppy herpes-ridden trio of Paris, Brittney and Lindsay, in addition to impregnating his college sweetheart. That's gross, gross, gross and irresponsible. Finally, Alyssa claims she dated Brad Penny "on a bet," which would also be good because Brad Penny is a fat hairy pig monster.

But Pavano, she confirmed. Jesus. I wonder if he needed Tommy John surgery after they held hands at dinner.

And so, in review, Alyssa is pretty smokin' hot. And we share a love for baseball, although we manifest that love in wildly dissimilar ways. She's easy on the eyes, even if her voice is more masculine than my own. I just wouldn't fuck her with your dick (Glavine?).