Thursday ThumbTubes & YouNails: 10-30-08

Well, we'll keep it simple today. No, not for the usual reason of laziness, but because the wife's out of town and that means there's nudey bars to drink and beers to waste money at. I know. The polls are really up on me getting the HotY (Husband of the Year) Award. What's that? Bonus points if today's her birthday, too? Zing! I'm a shoe-in. If only I'd conveniently forgotten her gift, and saved some more money for slothage, I could've made it a landslide. But hey, I had to at least convince her I'd behave.

Anyway, a few morsels lie ahead. They all have to do with balls that have lacing entwined in them. One of them involves a sport whose season just ended; the other's related to a campaign that's about half done. You know where you can find them...

Just when you thought the baseballin' was over, here comes plenty of baseball tibdits, like the fact that the Royals just sent reliever Leo Nunez to the Florida Marlins for Mike Jacobs.



Mike hit 32 long balls, drove in 93 runs and hit .247 with an OBP of .299 last season. I sure liked the first three of those stats better than the last two. Royals General Manager Dayton Moore, however, likes that he does so from the left side of the batter's box, and thinks that giving up Nunez is a bullpen gap the Royals can semi-easily fill.

Then there's Jeff Kent. Our very own Old No. 7 told us earlier in the year what a class act he is.



It appears, though, that Mr. Kent has once again outdone himself, this time coughing up 15 large towards the banning of gay marriage.

Then there's the city of Brotherly Love, happily and destructively celebrating their newly crowned champion Philadelphia Phillies.



Though dangerous, that looks like a lot more fun and a wee more safe than this one...



(both courtesy of Awful Announcing)

But enough about baseball. We'll stick with the crafty work of AA, and move on to football for a gem from the endless list of jewels Michael Irvin has given us over the years...



Then there's the big story that both John McCain and Barack Obama will appear on Monday Night Football next week, which, you know, nets a viewer or two and airs the night before election day. Since the House agrees on its candidate, and has no problem lifting images from the zany Kissing Suzy Kolber clan, we take no issue in hiding behind confidentiality...



And along the lines of Chiefs/Broncos pigskinnery, the only news Kansas City-wise is that Larry Johnson (props to Arrowhead Pride)



has fired his agent (shocker),




and that Broncos fans think every Bronco to ever don a blue-and-gold uniform belongs in Canton (double shock).

And that's about it for today, kids. Tune in tomorrow. We'll all get our learn on. Or something.