Thursday ThumbTube: The Kid's Good

Taking a page out of my own warm-up regiment, Sidney Crosby, ladies and gentlemen. Sidney Crosby.

(clip courtesy of the hockey networks)
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Baseball In The Daytime: 30 September 2009

Welcome, boys and girls, to the very last Baseball In The Daytime of September. Tomorrow we hit the month that Reggie Jackson made famous, the month that includes the playoffs--unless of course the World Series goes longer than five games.

Today we're starting off with the front ends of two doubleheaders necessitated by rainouts, and then wrapping up the day slate with a Mets-Nats tilt from DC. Every single team playing today has been eliminated from postseason consideration, these games are beneath meaning. Not even degenerate gamblers or fantasy geeks care--if you're betting on games involving the Pirates, Cubs, White Sox, Indians, Mets or Nats, you're probably also living under a bridge. And if your fantasy team contains players from any of those teams, your season is most likely done.

But hey, let's celebrate the pastime anyway! Joyous previews and sunshiney trivia after the jump!

Pittsburgh @ Chicago Cubs, 12:05 Mountain At least the Pirates are still trying--they took three of four from the Dodgers over the weekend to delay LA's not-quite-inevitable division championship a few days. In the final game of that series Monday, Zach Duke took an 11-0 shutout into the ninth. He yielded a run in that frame, yet one out away from a complete game blowout manager John Russell yanked him.

Look, we keep tabs on the Kansas City Royals in this space, so we know a little something about bad baseball teams and thickheaded management making not-smart decisions. But these Pirates--wow. Just wow. Charlie Morton gets the nod from Russell today opposite Ted Lilly.

Chicago White Sox @ Cleveland. 2:05 The other Windy City failure sets up shop next to Lake Erie this afternoon, as some kid who goes by the name of Carlos Torres dons the uniform of Eddie Cicotte and Horacio Ramirez. Will Torres throw the World Series and/or post a WHIP of 2.50? You'll have to watch to find out, as he battles Fausto Carmona in front of several dozen fans.

Los Mets @ Washington, 2:35 Tim Redding and John Lannan pitch, you decide. That's my little Fox News intro for this game. Take care, folks, we'll see you during Rocktober!
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Baseball In The Daytime: 16 September 2009

Today's BitD contains 100 per cent of your daily recommended allowance of calcium, riboflavin and fiber. Possible side effects include blurred vision and upset stomach. If your day baseball game lasts longer than four hours, please consult a physician.

With the fine print out of the way, let's check out the schedule, after the jump...

Cleveland @ Minnesota, 11:10 Mountain This is the last time Cleveland plays in the Metrodome, as the Twins open brand-new Target Field next April. It's not the last baseball game in the Hube, Detroit comes in tomorrow and the season ends with a three-game home set against the Royals. And I suppose that the Browns could still play the Vikings here, so technically it's not the last time ever a team from the city of Cleveland competes in this building. So let's not get all weepy and steal urinals on our way out the door. Aaron Laffey and Nick Blackburn are your scheduled starters.

Florida @ St. Louis, 12:15 The Marlins are still in this thing, by a thread. Colorado's three-game losing skid has left the Fish 4 1/2 out of the wild card with 17 yet to play. It's not inconceivable that they could catch the Rockies, although if they did so they'd probably then have to reel in the Giants as well. So I guess it is inconceivable, and this game is meaningless. Josh Johnson takes the hill for Florida, and if you're an NL Cy Young voter and you don't give Johnson one of your ten spots you are a punk. He's opposed by the one, the only, Joel Pineiro.

Pittsburgh @ LA Dodgers, 1:10 Even though they're still in first, and even though they have a nice lineup, no one is really taking the Dodgers seriously as World Series contenders. Their rotation is kind of a mess, riddled with question marks, and the current consensus is that LA can't matchup with St. Louis and Philly in the NL playoffs. Hiroki Kuroda, one of those question marks, takes on Kevin Hart today in (at? from?) Chavez Ravine.

Arizona @ San Diego, 1:35 Here at Baseball In The Daytime, we like to save the best for last. We like to, but we can't always deliver. I must apologize for our closing afternoon game, because it's cover-your-face awful. It "features" Doug Davis going for the D'Bags and Eduardo Mujica doing likewise for the Padres. These teams are a combined 34 games under .500 and are both on the verge of bankruptcy. Outside of Adrian Gonzalez and Justin Upton, there's not a single player on either roster I'd pay to watch play today. But hey, it's baseball, in a beautiful city, during daylight hours--that ain't bad I reckon. Marshall your courage and Play Ball!
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Baseball In The Daytime: Dressed To The Nines

It's 09/09/09, so go buy your Beatles Rockband for your Atari boxes. While you're at it, pick up a copy of Posnanski's new book. It comes out today, except it comes out next week.

If you choose not to rock out with your cock out or jam out with your clam out on plastic guitars, watch a ballgame. It's free, it's easy, and it's the law. Previews, after the jump...

Texas @ Cleveland, 10:05 Mountain If it weren't for the Rangers, the American League "pennant race" would be nonexistent. Texas is the only thing keeping the Angels from coasting to another AL West title (they're 4 1/2 back). They're the only reason the Red Sox have yet to wrap up the wild card (2 games separate the Sox and Rangers). The Cleveland Indians are not a part of any baseball race, except the one for Most Disappointing 2009 MLB Club. It's a pitched battle between them and the Mets, as the Cubs' comparatively strong recent play makes them merely frustrating. Scott Feldman and Fausto Carmona gets the starts.

Chicago @ Pittsburgh, 12:35 Speaking of the Cubbies, they're in Iron City this afternoon trying to make a little hay. Pittsburgh just clinched an ignominious honor--they're guaranteed to finish the season with a losing record for the 17th consecutive year. No other team in a major sport has ever done this, I'm told, so I guess what the Washington Generals do is not major, Major. Hate on Barry Bonds all you want, but the argument could be made that no athlete leaving a team had a greater impact than Barry moving on from the Pirates. Ex-Cub Kevin Hart tries to bring the pain to his old mates, who are represented by the Big Z.

St. Louis @ Milwaukee, 12:05 Adam Wainwright takes on Jeff Suppan in this meeting at Miller, and Wainwright's chief competition for the NL Cy Young Award dresses in his own clubhouse. Chris Carpenter probably took the lead in the Cy derby with his one-hitter against the Brewers Monday night. Can Wainwright match his teammate against the same gang of preening, douchey, underachieving blowhards? The Brewers really rub me the wrong way, especially that prick Ryan Braun. His act is tired.

San Diego @ San Francisco, 1:45 Watch the Giants, watch them fall. In the wild card standings, that is. Time is running out on these G-Men, they're now three games behind Colorado after ace Tim Lincecum (heh) tweaked some component of his back and touted prospect Madison Bumgarner (heh) was forced to make his big-league debut, a loss. At least they get to rely on currently-dependable millionaire Barry Zito and his 78-mph cheese today. Wade LeBlanc gets the nod from the Padres after being called up when Kyle Blanks hit the DL. LeBlanc is like the French version of Blanks, so expect him to give up...a few runs. Thank you, I'll be here all week. Make sure you tip your waitress, and Play Ball!
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