Baseball In The Daytime: May 14, 2009

We've got a whole mess of baseball on tap today, so let's get right after it.

Florida @ Milwaukee, 11:05 Mountain After the Brew Crew lost both C.C. Sabathia and Ben Sheets in the offseason, many felt that a big dropoff from their 94-win campaign in '08 was in store. I was one of those many, but I'll cheerfully admit I might have been dead wrong about these Beermakers. Ryan Braun is an absolute monster (albeit a petulant bitch), the defense is not horrible and the 'pen gets the job done. Dave Bush starts today at Miller Park, while Josh Johnson leads the charge for them Marlins.

LA Dodgers @ Philadelphia, 11:05 I've been to Citizens Bank Park in Philly, and it's a real nice place to take in a game. But if you're itching to visit and don't want to spring for the flight back East, simply go to Coors Field. Citizens Bank is a life-size replica, right down to Steve Carlton's survivalist bomb shelter in the basement. Chad Billingsley and Cole Hamels attempt to match zeroes in the rubber match of this three-game series.

Detroit @ Minnesota, 11:10 If you don't watch the Twins very much, you might think that Francisco Liriano is the ace of the staff. He has the most name recognition and the nastiest stuff (when he's healthy). But look a little deeper, and you'll discover that unheralded Scott Baker is actually the most indispensable Minny pitcher. After a brutal April he's started to pull it together, and as a result the Twins are making a move in that wacktastic AL Central. Justin Verlander starts for both the Tigers and my fantasy team, so he'd better not fuck this up.

Seattle @ Texas, 12:05 Felix Hernandez and Matt Harrison start this game, and don't look now but the Rangers just keep on winning. Hank Blalock knocked in the game-winner last night--why don't parents name their kids Hank anymore? I suppose I shouldn't cast stones, we just birthed a boy and did not name him Hank either. Perhaps the next one.

San Diego @ Chicago Cubs, 12:20 Not that this has anything to do with anything, but has anyone noticed how great the Reds are playing? After sweeping the D'Bags, they've pulled into a first-place tie with the Brewers and Cards, and their pitching is actually really good (until Bronson Arroyo implodes). Chicago sits a half-game back--so I guess that did have something to do with something--and Northside Nation turns its lonely eyes to erstwhile skipper Dusty Baker. If he wins it all in Cincy it will get ugly. Chad Gaudin and Ryan Dempster grip the seams to kick this one off at Wrigley.

Houston @ Colorado, 1:10 Another day, another truckload of proof that the 2007 World Series was the biggest fluke in sports history. Look, dude, the Rockies fucking suck ass. They always have, and until the meatpackers of the Monfort family divest themselves of controlling interest they always will. No one in this organization knows how to develop pitching, how to manage a salary structure on a roster, or how to win. There, I said it. Enjoy your baseball game, where Wandy Rodriguez will humiliate Jason Hammel.

Boston @ Los Anaheim, 1:35 Just when I was depressed and angry, along comes a reason to cheer up. Hell, I might even stay at work all afternoon to watch this one transpire on the Interwebs, or at least shuffle off to a bar that has the Extra Innings package. Ervin Santana makes his 2009 debut for the home Halos, while fat ass Brad Penny makes his return to Southern California for the visiting Red Sox. I'll bet he's got seven In-N-Out double-doubles in a bag in his lap as we speak. This one's a big one, folks, as this series is all tied up and, well, the Sox kick the Angels' ass in the playoffs every year. Perhaps that will change--it won't--but until then, Play Ball!