Sunday, January 4, 2009

Sunday Sermon: Is This Like the Fourth Time It's Been Sunday This Week?

Well, we haven't exactly been post-tastic this week, but everyone's schedule's been a bit screwy. While it would appear that the good games happened yesterday -- nothing like a 3-3 Dolphins/Ravens first half -- there have been some interesting things take place since we last checked in to articulate our thoughts and opinions on the Mike Shanahan firing. After the jump, we'll talk playoff football, the Winter Classic, and more. Please join.

In the universe of things miscellany, I'm a sucker for a good commercial, and the first to criticize a bad one. I happen to enjoy this one:

Now, if interpreting this ad as a prequel to a Manniams porn shoot is wrong, then believe me when I say that I don't want to be right. I will be ready and waiting to pirate that clip.

Regarding the New Year's Day hockey contest at Wrigley Field, I gotta say that it was conceptually awesome. I say conceptually because the outcome sucked, as all Red Wings victories do, but the venue looked spectacular, the fans appeared to really enjoy themselves, and after last year's amazing game at Ralph Wilson Stadium, it would be hard to imagine a better television rating in 2009, but it jumped 12 percent. My prediction for next year is a Rangers-Islanders contest at the new Yankees stadium. Perhaps those won't be the teams, but I feel pretty solid about the location. But enough about hockey, right?

Yesterday's NFL playoff games were awesome. Will Leitch's buzzsaw emerged victorious over Mike Smith, Matty Ice, and the Atlanta Falcons. The contest started strong with a surprising dose of Edgerrin James, and on one drive in particular, James and Brenda Warner's husband collaborated on a flea-flicking touchdown pass -- that culminated with an incredible Larry Fitzgerald catch -- to really set the pace of the game. The Arizona defense did a fantastic job of containing Michael Turner (42 yards), and ultimately, got themselves the win. Ken Wisenhunt's Cardinals established themselves as the greatest show on removable turf, and acquired many a bandwagoneer, myself included. It was a great appetizer to Saturday evening's main course: Marmalard versus Chesning.

(Update: The half has ended, and the Ravens are up 13-3, largely thanks to two Chad Pennington picks. The CBS Halftime Crew just interviewed Jeff Fisher, and showed a great clip of Bill Cowher (then with the Eagles) tackling Fisher (with the Bears) on a punt return play. Fisher, the punt returner, had his leg broken by Cowher, a play Fisher jokingly called dirty, and Cowher responded by saying that they were both "non-athletes; That's why we were on the punt teams.")

I asked Cecil and Seven how a Broncos fan possibly roots in this contest, given that a) though Denver has somehow had New England's number in recent years, the Colts have regularly destroyed them, and b) the Chargers-Broncos rivalry has, in the last two years, become the best in the AFC West, and among the tops in the conference. Seven, once Chesning finally got to the Super Bowl and won it, has gone on record, and admitted that his hate for the elder Manning brother has recently diminished. Add to that that he now hates the Chargers more, as "these things go in cycles," quoth the Hootster. Cecil, however, opted to root for a bomb to be detonated at Qualcomm, but one that only maims both signal callers.

Personally, I rooted for the Chargers. This was so for three reasons: 1) I'm tired of seeing Peyton in the post-season, 2) I'd like to see poor ol' Norv Turner have a few critics get off his back, and 3) the way that Whale's Vagina came back to claim the division from Denver, and vindicate HochuliGate, has got to be one of the best NFL stories in recent years. And by "recent years," I mean ever.

Anyway, much like the Kansas Jayhawks 2008 championship game, I didn't really expect to see this game get tied and go to overtime as the final fourth-quarter minutes approached. When it did, I was pumped for more football, and a Charger chance at Colt elimination. Darren "Webster Coleman" Sproles ripped off 328 yards in quite the performance, and Marmalard hit Gates with key passes in OT, concluding a great day of football, (Editor's Note: save the post-game interview with Rivers; that was quite painful.) which is much more than I can say for this Dolphins game. The best aspect of it thus far is the Ravens defense putting vicious hit after vicious hit on the Miami offense. (Update: Hey look: As I typed that the Ravens clobbered Patrick "Wayne" Cobbs and he coughed it up.)

Once this one's in the books, we'll get Philly-Minnesota. Snore. Now, I'd like to see the Eagles get the win there, just to silence the Viking hype. Brad Childress does not appear to be a great coach. Obviously, Adrian Peterson is an animal, but the quarterback situation there is a joke, and Jared Allen can help himself to a spoonful of bloody stool.

(Update: Mike Cox's least favorite player Le'Ron McClain just scored.)

And now that this game has gotten even more exciting, I'll conclude this random rant, and really not pay attention to it.

(Note: Ed Reed is a freaking animal.)


Cecil said...

And the most important reason the Chargers have to win: keeping Norv Turner employed.

I haven't a doubt that Shanahan would swoop into that situation with his fangs sharpened. It's imperative that the Bolts win at least one more game, so A.J. can't find an excuse to bag Turner.

bankmeister said...

A.J. is as A.J. does: douche bagger-ay.