Wednesday, September 19, 2007

We Are Hot Chicks Wednesday: Office Space

Everyone works, right? Okay. Most everyone. The House of Georges certainly does. While Cecil continues to extend his journalistic tenure for a prominent Colorado newspaper, Old No. 7 and I are in the process of changing our respective employment sceneries. Yesterday, Bankmeister (Editor's Note: See RickeyTalk) underwent orientation for said new job. It, in sum, entailed a bunch of paperwork and manuals and an enthralling sexual harrassment video, followed by a test over said video. Tax forms were filled out, documents were signed, and hands were shaken. What I walked away with was an abundance of ideas of how to make the work place a better environment. Today's installment will involve an overview of said theories, so let's get down to business.

The Big Decision



Changing jobs is never easy. Be sure to allow yourself plenty of time to ponder your choices, options and your future. A good candidate for employment will allow you at least one good night to sleep on it, if not more.


Two Weeks Notice



Before you accept that new position, it's imperative that you do the right thing: Inform your current employer of the decision you've made and offer them the customary time to find your replacement. This procedure is an absolute must. That way, when you leave the building for your final time, it is hoped that you may use that experience as a reference for future endeavors, and you may one day be welcomed back if the opportunity arises.


The Grand Welcome



You've chosen your new business because it's a good one, and good businesses have good people working for them. The really good ones have good secretaries, or receptionists, or hosts that will greet you at the door and start you off on the right foot.


The Tour



In a perfect world, that good first impression you got won't be your last.



Your new employer should stop at nothing to have a friendly co-worker show you the ins and outs of the facility. From the foyer to the employee lounge, it's crucial that you become familiar with your environment right away.


Your Own Work Space



Hammering out quality work should begin with comfort. If your office chair isn't comfortable, consider asking for permission to bring your own in.



And of course everyone wants a view, but there're only so many windows to go around. My advice: Be patient and work hard; you will ultimately be rewarded with a better locale.


Decorating



You can never go wrong with photos of beachside scenery,



but if the ocean's not your thing, cool landscape images of the desert, or the mountains, or the mountains and the desert, are certainly acceptable too.



Make certain your desk has a homey feel as well. A nice picture of the wife on your last vacation,



or your daughter in her new college dorm room will always give your co-workers a pleasant feeling when they enter your office.

It's equally important to remember what not to do, too.



For the single guys, especially those in a co-ed situation, no one wants to walk into a space where the walls are filled with pictures of pin-up girls,



or biker babes,



and certainly not centerfold-type photos or anything resembling pornography. All of these items, I learned yesterday, can contribute to a "hostile work environment," and nobody wants that.


Useful Sources of Energy



If you're the thrifty type, and you bring your lunch to work, hit the breakroom candy supply on your way out.



A little boost of sugar in the afternoon always makes that groggy, late-afternoon pillow of time feel more productive. Careful not to sneak it early and spoil your lunch, though!


Handy Tools



Co-worker anecdotes, even when they're not work-related are always full of ideas you can transpose into your work, so keep an ear open. Your neighbor may have an interesting tale from a business trip that you can apply to the task at hand.



Not every co-worker's a pal. Keep an open mind, though. If you feel yourself butting heads with someone, or they seem like they just want to duke it out with you, don't fret. There's always a valuable lesson to be learned from confrontation.



Feeling frustrated? Can't seem to find the answer anywhere? Google it! This ever-expanding tool compliments of the Internet is sure to solve your dilemna.


What To Avoid



Don't be judgmental. Don't like Bill's suit? Linda's earrings to gawdy for you? Put downs, especially when you're new, will get you nowhere.



Got a lot of ink? Interested in seeing the body art of others? Not in the office, buddy. Save the tattoo stories for happy hour. The bar's always a safe bet.



Feeling flirted with by that leering married colleague down the hall? Thinking you should keep it to yourself? Ah, ah, ah. You know better. Inappropriate behavior should be immediately reported to a supervisor. It's important that your boss be put "on notice," so that he or she may handle the situation quickly and effectively.



Long weekend with the in-laws catching up with you? Don't get caught lounging on the clock. My advice: Get a good night's sleep, drink plenty of water, and if necessary, keep a frosty Red Bullz-Eye nearby. Gives ya' wings!



Lastly, under no circumstances should you be caught catnapping. Feeling tired at work? See the doctor, and try to eat more vegetables. And of course, don't forget to exercise.

Keep these pointers in mind and a long-term successful stop at this junction in your career is inevitable. Congrats and best of luck!

(Photos courtesy of Daily Niner, Z0D, Gorilla Mask, Bullz-Eye and other affiliated sources of delightful scenerty.)




1 comments:

Commish CH said...

I printed this and posted it on the company bulletin board. One dude took it into the bathroom with him for a hour. Niiiiiiiiice work