Saturday, September 22, 2007

Designated Recognition of College Football

I know it's hard for our readers in isolated locales like Kansas City and the Yukon Territory to care about college football. The Irish are busy becoming Bowling Green with a minimum admission grade level. But the Iron Triangle's third leg knows the weight of the Saturday, yes indeedy. If only enough to realize, "shit, my favorite team blows."

Yes, the Colorado State Rams are now 0-3, having lost their tenth game in succession.

The worst part? The worst fucking part? They lost to the motherscratchin' Houston Cougars, a team that hasn't been relevant since the invention of the sideline reporter. And they blew a 14 point lead in the final quarter. Final score, 38-27. Houston went crazy. (Aat least, the 15,000 fans at the game did. The rest of the city never even realized the contest occurred.)

10 losses in a row. Once upon a merry time, prognosticators and respected internet d-bags wondered if this was the year the Rams made the big jump into the Top 10. Once, we had players like Joey Porter and Clark Haggans and Sean Moran and Matt Newton and Dexter Wynn and Bradlee Van Pelt. Once we played ferocious defense and ran the ball like yeomen hod-carriers. So what if we went against WAC/Mountain West competition? BYU and Utah and now TCU, even Wyoming--nothing to be ashamed of. Plus we'd throw in the occasional beatdown of a big school, like when Moses Moreno beat Michigan State at their place, or the famous upset of then #4 Arizona in 1994.

Um, those days are gone. It doesn't appear to be getting better anytime soon. I make fun of Notre Dame's potential 0-8 start knowing we might not be much better.

The difference, of course, besides TV contracts and awoken echoes and Gods that care about football, is that CSU sucked for generations. It was practically a Fort Collins birthright--our team can out-suck yours. Lose by 30? Screw you, pretty boy. We'll lose by 56. We piled up decades of suck that could hardly be matched in I-A.

And it looks, sadly, like Sonny's team will be revisiting that bad past. Otherwise known as our present and future. Fight on, you stalwart Ram team. Fight, fight. Fight.

But I think we could still beat Notre Dame.