Championships=Boobs

I don't know why, but this new Nike ad with Serena Williams cracks me up. Oh yeah, I do know why. It's because it shows her rack, and when you first read it you think it says "titties." Or, at the very least, "tittlies," which isn't even a word but could be. You know, it combines "tickle" and "titties," both of which are pretty good words. That is funny.

Now I've always been conflicted by Serena. Part of me think she looks like a dude. A ripped dude. But part of me is drawn to her massive curves. Yes, I am looking at her titles.

I think we're all out of whack when it comes to female athletes, especially hot or semi-hot ones. Nike is trying to make a point that these chicks are athletes first and that their attractiveness is secondary (Mia Hamm, Picabo Street and Gabby Reece are also part of the campaign). I call shenanigans on the whole affair.

Nike is in the business of selling shit, and hot people (be they male or female) sell more shit than ugly ones. I don't see Jeff Garcia or Billy Jean King in this or any other big Nike effort. So blow me, Nike.

Meanwhile, I hope to get a good peek at Reece's "titles" in the coming weeks. She's got some good ones.