Wrapping the First

This live bloggery took it out of me. I left it, like Kellen Winslow in 1980, on the field. All of it. And by "all of it" I mean a bit of vomit.

Enjoy the second round--I plan to watch it with a clear mind, knowing I didn't make some ridiculous promise to write about the thing while it's happening. Players I would love the Broncos to grab in this round, pick one:

Pat Sims DT Auburn
Tyrell Johnson S Arkansas State
Devin Thomas WR Michigan State
Jordy Nelson WR Kansas State
Trevor Laws DT Notre Dame



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NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

Mock draft pick #31, New York Giants, last one of the first round because the Patriots cheat: Tyrell Johnson S Arkansas State. Which will bum me out because I want him to last to our second round pick. These commercials for "Pasta Hut" make me feel like I had an ipecac smoothie.

Giants' actual pick: Kenny Phillips S Miami. Well, got the position right. Maybe there's hope for us getting Tyrell (whose real first name is Marcellous) in the second after all.


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NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

Mock pick #30, Green Bay Packers: Pat Sims DT Auburn. Fits, as I like to mention, the system, and this team gets it--draft as many linemen as possible.

Wow, yet another trade. The Jets trade up to #30. No all caps this time, my blood sugar is running low.

(By the way, loose dog update: turns out that was a show dog that escaped from its owner's house on south Federal, almost completely outside of Denver. Jesus. That dog took a trip. It had been gone for 4 days! But thanks to Brandy's relentless phone calling and calm nature--at one point I was screaming obscenities at the woman from the Municipal Shelter, and yes, my fellow bloggers will get a chuckle out of my referring to her being calm--Samara the show Borzoi made it home. Like Ice Cube said, have to say it was a good day.)

Jets' actual pick: a new fan base to replace these idiots. Ah, but it was not to be--rather, they get Dustin Keller TE Purdue.


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NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

Mock pick #29, San Francisco 49ers: Limas Sweed WR Texas. God, Chris Berman is such a tool.

49ers actual pick: Kentwan Balmer DT North Carolina State. This makes sense for them, but I'd kinda like to hit one again soon.

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NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

Mock pick #28, Seattle Seahawks via trade with Dallas Cowboys: Dustin Keller TE Purdue. Dance with who brung ya.

Seahawks' actual pick: Lawrence Jackson DE USC. You know, I don't think I went to any dances ever, as I recall.

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NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

Mock pick #27, San Diego Chargers: Some 'Roided-up Doucheclock...OK, OK, they'll take Carl Nicks OL Nebraska. Because I said so. And he might be anyway. Man, I can't believe we're already on pick #27.

Chargers' actual pick: Antoine Cason DB Arizona. Another good player for this fucking team. Suck it, San Diego.


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NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

Mock pick #26, Houston Texans via trade: Brandon Flowers DB Virginia Tech. Gotta go somewhere around here, and they need the help in the defensive backfield.

Texans' actual pick: Duane Brown OL Virginia Tech. Well, I had the right school, anyway.


Kuuuubbes
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NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

Mock pick #25, Seattle Seahawks: Dustin Keller TE Purdue. They need a tight end, he's the consensus top in a weak class, and he doesn't pee off his balcony and rape girls like Jerramy Stevens (so far as we know).

Another freakin' trade...Ok, I can't resist--TRADE ALERT!!!!!!!! The Cowboys move up a few slots to pick...Mike Jenkins DB South Florida. Makes sense that they'd pick him, and it was rumored all over. The Cowboys exhibit something of a lack of intrigue with these two picks.

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NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

Mock pick #24, Tennessee Titans: Devin Thomas WR Michigan State. Someone has to take a wideout sometime, right? And this team actually needs one to attempt to catch VY's foot-level passes.

Titans' actual pick: Chris Johnson RB East Carolina. Yeah, wasn't expecting this. I thought this kid would be a target for the Broncos in the 2nd round, not going this high--much less to a team that spent a high pick on LenDale White a couple of years ago.

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NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

I'm not gonna bother with a mock pick, since they just showed Rashard Mendenhall on the phone with Pittsburgh. So it's a done deal at #23. I was hoping he'd have a Portis-esque free fall, but it looks like he has a date with a Primante's sandwich.

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NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

Mock pick #22, Dallas Cowboys: Felix Jones RB Arkansas. Lazy pick on my part, sure. But no one ever said I wasn't lazy.

Cowboys' actual pick: Felix Jones RB Arkansas. Score one for the lazy. And look at the guy--he's supposed to be in his early 20s?


why are you looking here?
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NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha: The Administrator Checks In

A note from out east...

Okay. This is just flippin' insane. I can't remember a draft with this much travashamockery ever. First overall signed three days out. Two overall all but done. A gazillion trades for spots in the first round. The fact that it's zipping by with the ten-minute change. And of course, I must mention that I'm equally pumped and blown away by the moves that the Chiefs have pulled. Giving away a fifth and swapping third spots with the Lions is fine with me if we walk away two first-rounders that fill huge needs, and 12 total picks. Good, good times.

There's got to be somebody in disguise in that War Room, given that Herm and Carl are allegedly running the show. Finally, mad mad props to the league for playing the War Chant while the Chiefs were on the clock. Talk about classy. Screw San Diego. I'll take New York.

And here is the rest of it. Read more

NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

Mock pick #21, Washington Redskins: Kenny Phillips S Miami. I doubt this will actually occur, but I'm sticking with my last mock. Because I fear change.


GAH! TRADE ALert...ok, enough with the all caps. Atlanta trades up to 21 and takes...Sam Baker OT USC. Um, I don't think this was a great pick. Certainly not worth trading up to get--especially since he'd probably have been available later.
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NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

Mock pick #20, Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Devin Thomas WR Michigan State. They need a wideout and I'm goin' back to the well.

Buccaneers' actual pick: Aqib Talib CB Kansas. Whoa-ho! So much for Aqib falling all the way to TLR in the second. No matter what they say about this kid's attitude, etc., I watched a ton of Kansas games last year and he can freaking play. Good pick.And here is the rest of it. Read more

NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

I should have eaten breakfast. Damn.

Mock draft pick #19, Philadelphia Eagles: Jeff Otah LT Pittsburgh. Fits their system and could be an absolute monster, assuming he stays off the TastyKakes...yes, weight-related humor is the reason you come here. Tip your servers, shows at 7 and 10 nightly.

Yow! Another TRADE ALERT!!!!!!! Complete with gratuitous exclamation points! Carolina trades for the 19th pick and takes...Jeff Otah LT Pittsburgh. I win again.

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NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

Mock pick #18, Baltimore Ravens via trade from Houston Texans: Brandon Flowers CB Virginia Tech.

Ravens' actual pick: Joe Flacco QB Delaware. Another developmental guy from a team that loves strong arms--remember Kyle Boller throwing through the uprights from his knees? Flacco has proved exactly nothing versus actual competition, but Ozzie knows what he's doing. Usually. Start the Fighting Blue Hen pipeline to the League...
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NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

Mock pick #17, Detroit Lions from KC Chefs: Rashard Mendenhall RB Illinois. Seriously, this might mean Matt Millen is being smart---if they wanted Rashard a few picks back and traded down to get him here, that's a pretty savvy move. Or maybe they didn't and I'm just trying to justify my own constant re-picking.

Lions' actual pick: Gosder Cherilus LT Boston College. OK, so they didn't. But this isn't a bad pick for this team--better than George Foster, anyway.


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NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

Mock pick #16, Arizona Cardinals: Rashard Mendenhall RB Illinois. If at first you don't succeed...


Cardinals' actual pick: Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie CB Tennessee State. This kid was another postseason riser. I dunno about this--they did just spend a first on Antrel Rolle, who gets moved to safety now--but then, I dunno about this team. And here is the rest of it. Read more

NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

Making a mockery, we go to the capital thereof...

Mock pick #15, Detroit Lions: Rashard Mendenhall RB Illinois. Has to happen, right? They can't rely on Tatum Bell, and they need to hit one out here.

TRADE ALERT!!!!

And it's the Chefs making noise, trading up to #15 to grab Branden Albert, who is a pretty damned solid pick--even though he played guard in college and will probably be asked to play tackle in the League. Still, though, two for two in Bankworld. Screw you, Peterson. Didn't you used to be a moron?




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NFL Draft, Live Blog Edition Alpha

Christ, this first round is whizzing by like it was attached to Onterrio Smith's scrotum...

Mock pick #14, Chicago Bears: Rashard Mendenhall RB Illinois.

Bears' actual pick: Chris Williams, LT Vanderbilt. Cutler doesn't get the guy we were widely expected to take, but Sexy Rexy does.
And here is the rest of it. Read more