We Are Hot Chicks Wednesday: Actually, All of Us Are Hot

Yass, yass. We're back with another installment of one of our longest running features that never gets "read." That's right. It's Wednesday, and our host can barely shed his layers quick enough in order to cool off and set up what's in store. So if you can make haste without breaking into a cold sweat, get beyond the jump and feel the heat.

Oh. And make sure to bring your tightest dance moves. There will be judges posting scores in various categories, so have your Sunday best on, and have your game, too.

Ashlynn Letizzia



Monday was hot. Damn hot. Ashlynn hot.

Carmen Silva



Tuesday cooled down to Carmen Silva levels, which is like three degrees.

Eva Cifrova



And three degrees was nearly enough to force me to strip down to a Cifrova wardrobe.

Gemma Massey



This, of course, means that today topped Monday.



We're talkin' 101 on the Gemmometer.



Heather Vandeven



Spending as much time in my car as I do during the average work day,

Jaclyn Case



I had to do something.

Karissa & Kristina Shannon



Left with no choice, I bought one of these.



It was either that or explode, and not in a way that the Shannons would've wanted.

Karlie Madelyn



Miss Madelyn approved.

Natasha Anastasia



Some folks, i.e. Natasha, can handle the heat.

Olivia Munn



I roll like Miss Munn, stripped down and inside.

Kellie Maines



If down the road from my office, just off of Maines Street,



I could immerse myself in a refreshing body of water,



I'd do it.



Actually, I'd do "it," and Kellie in one fell swoop.



Not that you're interested in hearing my bare my all,



but believe you me, it's better than seeing me do it,



so give thanks. Such sights are better suited for other folks.

Marzia Prince



So, yeah. If you're looking for advice, it's this: Stay inside.



Keep the shades drawn,



and make sure your outfit's comfy.



If you wanna get all greased up and filthy in this mess,



at least make sure there's a breeze.



If you're not careful, you could wind up seeing double. Or triple, even.



I'd keep a bathing suit handy until further notice,



because as hot as it is, it can still heat up at any moment.



Trust me.



Just when you think you've seen as hot as it can get, boom. Another notch.



So I take the reverse approach; I dress in layers.



Shit gets a little unbearable, take some shit off.



Marzia doesn't have any problem doing so.



And neither should you.



The mercury, among other things, has only begun to rise.



Be ready for rocketing proportions of increase, or be ready to suffer.

That's it for this week. All you HoGers, thank our sponsors. They provide us with umbrellas, suntan lotion, and ice-cold water.