Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Tradition Tuesday: Don't Call It a Throwback (Been Here for Years)

Many months ago, in the blessed days when I was the last remaining bachelor of the Iron Triangle, there was, if you will, a meeting of the minds. The topic of said meeting was a mental sumo-wrestling match, the title bout, if you will, of three grown men attempting to figure out what the rough focus of this blog was to be. It was long, gruelling, and torturous, and instead of a trio of obese, castrated Asians in diapers, it was more like three pasty, well-endowed (Editor's Note: Take me seriously when I say that I speak for only myself there.), beer-bellied wordsmiths. The commonality was the battle, though. We entertained, for fewer seconds than I can hardly recall, the following notions:

1) The Ultimate NASCAR Blog
2) The WNBlogA
3) The Billiards and Bowling Blog, and
4) a hybrid of championship poker and tablog-tennis,

but in the end, the gavel slammed, and it was determined that the focus would somehow relate to the rivalry between the Denver Broncos (Cecil and Seven pounced on that pile of rotten meat like starved scoundrels in the desert) and the Kansas City Chiefs (wherein I proudly took one for the team). It was decided as such, given our years of experiencing matriculating to one another's football back yards, where there is always guaranteed a plethora of canned beer, smoked protein, and a vessel's worth of curse words. We fondly titled such excursions The Tradition, which brings us to today, another installment of "Tradition Tuesday," where we bring you the weekly state-of-the-rivalry address.

There are a number of football topics to discuss today, so let's not waste any time. I will expect, as always, extended opining in the comments section by each and every one of you readers. Shall you fail this assignment, I'll be shredding the rest of the week's gold stickers and sending notes home to your parents.

First, we've spent more time discussing the Jay Cutler situation than there are hours in Lent. But the thing won't die. Really. It's like the Peter Griffin-chicken fights in "Family Guy." And like most days in the past three-four weeks, another tidbit has surfaced, and the gang at BroncoTalk delivered an interesting photo

attached to a story, wherein Coach Doogie had just concluded an interview and proudly (Note: By "proudly," I mean nice smile, Mosh.) held up Denver's version of the legacy jersey, foreshadowing of the upcoming "Legacy Games" that will take place this year. Each team will wear a throwback for one road, one away game. McDaniels was quoted in The Denver Post explaining why Young No. 6's work shirt was chosen:

"I wouldn't have wanted it to be any other player,” quoth the Doogster.

On the Kansas City side of things, this means that the Chiefs will don the ol' Texans jerseys. Personally, I have no problem with that whatsoever. The late Lamar Hunt always considered the Dallas Cowboys a rival, and never got a chance to see the Texans take on America's team, in that the Texans were only in Dallas for three seasons. But there's another interesting twist, or two, to that The Kansas City Star article:

"The NFL announced the nationally televised games from the opening weekend of the season. Neither the Chiefs nor the Cowboys are involved, so it’s possible their game could be played on opening weekend...Denver is another possible opponent for the Chiefs that weekend. The league is looking to promote the 50th season since the launch of the old AFL. The league matched two original AFL franchises, the Bills and Patriots, in one opening weekend game and two more, the Chargers and the Raiders, in another."

To either of those, I say bring it. Of course, I don't consider the Cowboys a rival to my Chiefs, but it would be a neat way to kick off the season, and I imagine, a fascinating game as far as seeing where these two teams sit in terms of talent and productivity. If the latter is true, than I can assure you that I know three guys that will be at that game, each of whom clad in throwback helmets of their own. And rest assured, I'm stoked that mine doesn't look the slightest bit gay.

Since the NFL has taken to tossing us fans mere pieces of the schedule pie, I'll note that Denver has been given the Thanksgiving evening game. I think that's fantastic for two reasons: 1) The Chiefs got it three years ago, and it was a blast. I spent most of Tuesday and Wednesday of that week preparing Thanksgiving dinner, and figuring exactly how I would re-heat in the Arrowhead parking lot without drying everything out. It was great fun. It was not something I'd want to do every year because it was a lot of work, and frankly, Thanksgiving should be spent with families, unless you're a Packer or a Lion fan, and you've been doing that your whole life. 2) I think each great football community should have such an experience, and I include Denver -- even if they are pillow-biting uncle-fuckers -- in that sentiment.

There are two oddities about the thing, though: 1) As I'm sure you either already knew, or have since concluded, why is Denver in the mix for a second time three seasons into this new tradition? I mean, aside from the fact the the Broncos get 11 prime-time telecasts per year and 12 of those are home games, I thought the notion of this gig was to spread the games around. 2) They're hosting the Giants? Whatever. That's just, well, aside from the pout-fest -- or as Kissing Suzy Kolber put it: "Cutler and Eli having a sulk-off" -- factor, completely lame.

As for other news with the teams, Broncos Gab reports that the club is interested in shopping some of its tailbacks, and that some non-Cutler McDaniels decisions have irritated some teammates, while Mile High Report offers, well, more Cutler:

KC Chiefs Football wants us to know that Chairman Clark Hunt is interested in keeping Tony Gonzalez, unsure about Brian Waters and Larry Johnson. Arrowhead Addict looks at some affordable free agents the Chiefs might could consider, and if that's not enough Chiefs/Broncos information to make you want to throw up, then hopefully this will be:


Cecil said...

Are we a throwback to the Browns? Why did they go allllll the way back to those ugly fuckers? Are we going to be seeing the vertically-striped socks?

Cecil said...

And fuck me, that helmet. Last time we wore those the Raiders beat us 48-16.

Dylan said...

Not to rub the weterners nose in anything but, this Cutlergate has got some frickin' legs.
I'm not sure of all the parameters/deadlines involved but, it looks to last up until the opening kickoff.
PR advice to Pat Bowlen: Put that kid back in the basement where you had him locked up before.
Strollin' him out with a Cutler jersey?

bankmeister said...

In all honesty, I actually think that helmet's pretty awesome.