Historically Speaking: Old No. 7

School might be out, but there's always room for learnin'. Oh, come on. We've even thrown in a song to make the learnin' funner.

* Some football broadcast firsts today: The University of Texas and Texas A&M debuted the art of play-by-play broadcast today in 1920 down in College Station, Texas. Forty-five years later, the NFL gave the world the first color television broadcast in the form of a Detroit Lions/Baltimore Colts 24-24 tie.

* Speaking of the Lions, a Buffalo Bill by the name of Orenthal James Simpson rushed for 273 yards against them today in 1976.

* The year was 1981 when a cat by the name of Rollie Fingers became the first relief pitcher to win the American League MVP award. Fingers accomplished the feat via 319 votes, a solid 11 votes more than runner-up Rickey Henderson, who, by the way, is most definitely not Tony Gwynn, or the third-best hitter of the past 25 years.

* Today in 1983, Larry Holmes defeated Marvis Frazier by way of technical knockout in the first round of a heavyweight championship fight in Las Vegas, Nevada.

* Sources indicate that, today in 2002, MLB Commissioner Bud Selig met secretly with Pete Rose to discuss The Hit King's lifetime ban from the game.

And your Sports Illustrated quote of the day came from the mouth of...



...Florida Marlin publicist Chuck Pool, who, in 1994, witnessed an upper-deck home run at Joe Robbie Stadium. The jack, hit by Cincinnati Red outfielder Kevin Mitchell, prompted Pool to say, "There have been a plethora of guys to hit it up there, but that was the plethorest."
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Nobody Undersells The King!

Peter King, as is his wont, made a dumb prediction today. No jolt there. That's Peter; such a textured study of the comfortable professional know-it-all that he should be portrayed on the stage. I see Andy Richter doing it. Maybe Warwick Davis on stilts.

Then he followed with a metric tonne of self-satisfied offal. Read on, MacSitOnYourDuffs...

"Of course, when you're thinking about this year's Super Bowl pick, the first thing that goes through your mind is, "Can I please pick two AFC teams?'' Face it: The best three teams in football right now -- and this cannot be debated -- are New England, Indianapolis and San Diego, in some order. Who's fourth? I don't know. Maybe the Saints. Maybe Baltimore, Denver, Chicago."

Whattya mean, this cannot be debated? What the fuck good is something like your column--indeed, sport itself--if it can't be debated? You issue the decree, vetted by your canape-snorting brethren, and that's it? Bullhockey, Mr. King. Bull. Hockey.

And this little bit of virtual fellatio...

"The Patriots, quite simply, have had the best offseason of any team in the free-agency era since the Packers stole Reggie White in 1993 and he became the best recruiter in the NFL. Even if Randy Moss is cut before the first game, the New England offense is dramatically better because Wes Welker and Donte Stallworth give the Pats the kind of talent at receiver they've never had in the Belichick Era."

Sorry, but does anyone else remember the Redskins of the late '90s? When they were collecting Deion and Carrier and whoever the fuck else? Back then, drunk on The Snyde's new car smell, guys like King ate that shite on toast with baked beans. They're doing it again now. If Wes Welker had gone to any other team in the league, would you have read a solitary word about it?

Finally...

You did the right thing, Billy Donovan. You were taking the job in Orlando for the money, regardless of how you tried to convince yourself otherwise, but there will always be money for people as talented as you.

Hey, Pete...hold up. Here. Wipe that off, man. Your wife doesn't believe you anymore. She doesn't believe anything anymore.

And for Christ's sake, fasten up your belt. Read more