How Not To Fix The World Baseball Classic

There's still smoke and confetti in the air following Japan's thrilling extra-innings win over Korea in last night's World Baseball Classic final. The trophy engraver's tools are still warm, the players have yet to return to their professional clubs, and yet a chorus is already in full throat. The WBC is broken, sayeth the nays, and here's how you fix it.

Everyone seems to have a solution to the problem--hold it during a different time of year, mix up the format, force the best players to participate. The possible changes are infinite, but the impetus for these critics' frustration is identical: Their team lost.

Had the United States managed to win this tournament, the conventional wisdom would have been that it's fine--at least until the first big WBC star suffered an injury this season. I'm sure that the Dominican blogscape is even more vitriolic, after the DR was dumped in the first round by a motley nine from various Dutch colonies. Conversely, I doubt many Japanese or Korean pundits have a beef with the WBC's current landscape.

My only hangup is with the captain of this ship, one Allan H. "Bud" Selig. As with most pivotal decisions Bud has made, the WBC has infuriated me in execution while pleasing me in substance. If we could only lessen Bud's grip on this tournament, it might end up just about right.

Look, I wanted to win just as badly as any other American fan. I suffered through appearances by our starting pitchers, guys who are normally dominant but looked rusty and rotten this March. I too wished that aces such as C.C. Sabathia, Cole Hamels and Jonathan Papelbon could have found their way onto the roster.

The U.S. also went through a long dry spell in international basketball, but we were able to remedy that at the Beijing Olympics. This country should realize that we can't just roll out an all-star team and expect to dominate the world. Our size and wealth offers us tremendous advantages, but hinders us as well. Japan is the most homogeneous society in the world, free from our racial, linguistic and regional differences. It's far easier for Japan to assemble a team that acts as a cohesive unit than it is for the U.S.

But those are provincial problems with specific American players, not structural deficiencies in the event.

The largest issue, for every nation but particularly for those that rely on MLB players, is the readiness of pitching. This is an enormous crapshoot, as pitching tends to be in any short-format playoff. How else can you explain how Freddy Garcia was a postseason stud for the 2005 World Champion White Sox, yet was dogshit before and has been dogshit since?

Major league pitchers are used to ramping up their workload during March. Starters will toss an inning or so in their first few appearances and gradually add to their pitch counts. It's only this week that you're seeing pitchers in the Cactus and Grapefruit leagues turn in appearances that approximate what they'll show in the regular season.

Pitchers also use March to try goofy shit, because the games don't matter. Zach Greinke of the Royals has been dabbling with a new changeup grip and getting absolutely torched. If that grip is ready for Opening Day he'll add it to his arsenal, if not he'll scrap it when the games count. The point is that Spring Training is the only chance these guys get to experiment with unproven tricks under game conditions.

So by running the WBC throughout the month of March, you do a couple things with pitching. You throw players who have yet to work into shape into the fire before they're ready--how else can you explain Carlos Marmol getting lit up by the Netherlands? You also remove their built-in laboratory for tinkering. The results can be erratic.

The best potential solution I've heard comes via Jayson Stark of the four-letter. He wants to distill the monthlong grind of the current WBC into a one-week sprint at the end of March, when pitchers should be approaching peak form. You'd play games every day at multiple sites, eliminating the numerous off days that had participants bitching about sporadic workloads. You'd end up with a final four, and you'd play the semis and finals during a lengthened All-Star break in July--when interest in baseball is at its peak and the players are literally in midseason form. I think it's brilliant, but it will never happen.

That's because Bud Selig and his fellow owners are the most short-sighted gang of rich people alive. Every decision baseball makes is focused only on the immediate dollar, never the long-term growth of the game. Shortening or suspending the season to accommodate the WBC are off the table, because owners will not sacrifice game revenue. This is also the primary reason that baseball has been booted from the Olympics in 2012--Bud and his cronies refuse to plan around a break in the season as the NHL has done.

Selig shouldn't take all the blame for the sorry state of international baseball--the players' union is devious and obstinate on this issue as well. They've stonewalled drug testing for decades, as we know, and even with all the strides baseball has made on doping the union still refuses to allow Olympic-standard testing by the World Anti-Doping Agency. Blood testing for possible HGH detection is similarly opposed. The international sports community looks at professional baseball in America as a dirty game run by crooks, because it is. Fuck, even cycling has more credibility.

The idea of a World Baseball Classic is fantastic, and as we've seen in 2006 and this spring, the world can play. High-level ball is being played by athletes from dozens of countries. If we approached this tournament with integrity, instead of only looking for American TV viewership and merchandise sales, it could grow into a true classic.
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Thursday ThumbTubes & YouNails: 3-19-09

The third Thursday in March used to mean something to me. I remember getting excited for the NCAA tournament and doing brackets some 20 years ago, and at the time, it was pretty novel because only myself and like three other friends would do one. It seemed as if we couldn't recruit people to participate. Well, like everything else sports/media related, the science of bracketology has just plain gotten out of hand. It's been a number of years now that we've had to adapt to the fact that women are participating in brackets, and allow me to remind you to back up a solid 5000 yards if they win one. Those victories are equated to the second coming of the Messiah. But Christ, I caught a significant portion of Rome today, and it seems like that was all he talked about: bracket updates (with obnoxious air-raid siren), and e-mails from bracketers, and tips on how to get away with watching the games at work. He skipped out on several stories he "wanted to get to," like, oh, I dunno, Jay Cutler. Sure. I'm still into the Madness, but come on.

Now this is the moment where I invite you past the jump to look at some stuff. And yes, some of said some stuff has to do with brackets. Sigh.

The House of Georges affinity for Team America has



taken a shot to the ball of yard. And with that open wound comes a hefty dose of salt.



"The desperation defensive deployment backfired Wednesday night in the World Baseball Classic when Dunn made a wild throw that led to four unearned runs, and Venezuela won Group 2 by beating the Americans 10-6 to conclude second-round play in Miami...Both teams had already qualified for the semifinals this weekend in Los Angeles. Injury-plagued Team USA is expected to make several roster moves before then."

At least the club can take solace in the fact that they have qualified for the next round, and, well, there's this:



which makes us feel good knowing that there aren't any gays on the roster.

In news of the slightly less comforting, it's HoG noteworthy that there is Royalty in Kansas City.



Let's hope his latest stop can contain appropriate behavior and good production.

Speaking of good, our old pals over at Bugs & Cranks have an interesting series going. They've also graced us with this:



And quickly abandoning such an impressive theme, onto the White House and brackets, courtesy of Awful Announcing:



And since we're in the neighborhood, you've got to see this if you haven't already:



Jumping from the hardwood to the ice, Hugging Harold Reynolds takes us to Total Pro Sports, who put together this piece



on the newest all-time winningest goaltender in the NHL: Marty Brodeur.

And we'd be off-kilter if we didn't touch more on Jay Cutler. To keep the kilter balanced, however, we've got to include a Chief story, even if it's about a former Chief becoming a Chief again.

That's gonna wrap 'er up for the Tubes and Nails today. Same time, same place next week. We'll be the ones typing.
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Classic.

If I'm the only person in America banging the World Baseball Classic drum, so be it. I love this shit, I'm nuts for it, and last night's incredible comeback win for Team USA merely cemented my disturbingly inappropriate lust. That game was over, done, and I was mentally preparing myself to pull for Puerto Rico the rest of the way. They're really good, they're not run by socialist dictators like Cuba and Venezuela, and at the end of the day Puerto Rico is America. Like literally, they belong to us.

But then, in the bottom of the ninth, the gritty, speedy, pain-in-the-ass U.S. lineup pulled a miraculous victory from their ass. Our country may be broke and broken, our political system in shambles, our military might compromised, our way of life delegitimized. We can still beat a small, poor territory in baseball, though! Take that France.

So WBC baseball lives on for American fans, all six of us. Let's get into what lies ahead in this tournament, from tonight's bullshit "Pool Championship" to possible U.S. roster changes to this weekend's Final Four in LA, after the jump...

Throughout Team USA's games in the WBC, two weaknesses have emerged. One is that the starting pitching has been far below-average, and the other is that the Americans have been far too reliant on the long ball. Those two problem areas cost them an opening-round game against the Venezuelans, and they murdered the U.S. in their embarrassing mercy-rule blowout loss to Puerto Rico Monday.

The four U.S. starters (Jake Peavy, Roy Oswalt, Ted Lilly and Jeremy Guthrie) are all fine, but none are anywhere close to midseason form. Oswalt is the unquestioned ace at this point, and Lilly bounced back from a rough loss to Venezuela with a solid performance last night. Relievers Heath Bell and Jonathan Broxton spoiled the 3-3 tie they inherited from Lilly, however, and the U.S. found themselves down 5-3 headed to the bottom of the ninth.


When the Americans have won WBC games, they've typically scored via the home run. Adam Dunn and Kevin Youkilis have been notching taters at a healthy clip, and Jimmy Rollins and Brian McCann have gone yard as well. That's all well and good, because chicks dig the long ball, but the situation late last night in Miami dictated a small ball approach rather than waiting for a titanic blast. A series of U.S. batters--Shane Victorino, Brian Roberts, Derek Jeter, Jimmy Rollins, Youk and finally David Wright--ground out sustained at bats which loaded the bases, chased J.C. Romero, walked in a run and finally won the game.

USA Baseball has some decisions to make before Saturday's first semifinal at Dodger Stadium. Chipper Jones needs to be replaced due to his injury, and Evan Longoria is the only other pure third baseman on the provisional roster. Longoria's a nice player and contributes a lot of power, but I pray that manager Davey Johnson keeps him on the bench and leaves Wright on the field. I can't see Johnson ditching Peavy, even though he's killing his team, but why not lose Guthrie or Lilly for John Danks or Justin Verlander, both of whom are pitching well this spring?

If you're wondering why the U.S. plays again tonight, even though they're already ticketed for the semis, join the club. This game against Venezuela will determine the seeds for the Final Four, with the winner playing Saturday against the Pool 1 runner-up, the loser going Sunday versus the Pool 1 champ. Neither opponent has been determined, as Japan and Cuba play a knockout game tonight, the winner advancing to the Pool 1 finale tomorrow night.

Whom would I like the U.S. to face? Although I feel Japan's the best club in Pool 1, I think they're also our best matchup due to familiarity. Far fewer Koreans have made it to MLB, and Cuba is a closed baseball mystery. So root, root, root for the Japanese tonight. Oh, and hope Guthrie can limit Venezuela to less than a dozen runs as well.
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What You Need To Know About The World Baseball Classic

If you're a typical baseball fan, you've glanced at the ongoing World Baseball Classic with some mild interest. It sure can't compare to the excitement of Opening Day for your hometown club, but it's way more amusing than typical Spring Training action. These games certainly count for something, and there's the added element of national pride.

Problem is, the whole thing is fucking confusing. Why did the U.S. play Venezuela again Wednesday night? Didn't we already win our pool? And most important, if this tournament is supposed to showcase the finest players from all the baseball-playing countries in the world, why in the fuck is LaTroy Hawkins allowed anywhere near a mound?

All your WBC head-scratchers solved, after the jump...

DOUBLE ELIMINATION

This relic of slow-pitch softball tournaments and children's soccer shootouts is the reason for the perplexing first-round schedule. Every nation, from the mighty Puerto Ricans to the lowly South Africans, had to lose twice to get sent home. This was the reason the Americans had to take on Venezuela one more time (they lost, meaning a quarterfinal opener against Puerto Rico instead of the Netherlands).

The double-elimination format in pool play is a change from the round-robin arrangement in 2006. No one liked that--too many pools were bound up with tied teams and the tiebreakers always came down to run differential. And run differential is about as fun to talk about as your whore mom. So I suppose this is an improvement?

Not really--it's actually quite misleading. By calling the first round "double elimination" you might think that the Netherlands (who lost twice to Puerto Rico) and Mexico (who lost to both Australia and Cuba) would be history, right? Wrong. Both finished second in their pool and get to move on to the quarters.

But, thankfully, the first round is over. Eight teams are moving on to Miami and San Diego, where they'll face off in...another double elimination pool format.

WHO ARE THOSE TEAMS?

Glad you asked. First and foremost is the United Fucking States of America, the country that invented the game and hosts its premier league. It's about God damned time we did something other than suck spectacularly at international baseball.

We Americans have a deep and tremendously versatile bullpen as our greatest strength. That's a good thing, because the starting staff is shaky at best. Roy Oswalt is the guy you want out there, but he's not yet in shape for the season and probably couldn't go 6 innings if he wanted to (the 70-pitch limit from Round One has been expanded to 85 in this stage). Jake Peavy, for all of his greatness, is an awful big-game pitcher. I've come to this conclusion. Ted Lilly and Jeremy Guthrie are filler.

The USA has been blessed with a pretty fine offensive showing this far, with Kevin Youkilis and Adam Dunn--yes, Adam Dunn--providing the stiff wood. The shortstop platoon of Jeter and Rollins is fantastic, David Wright and Ryan Braun are playing well (although Braun is awful defensively, Jesus) and the gritty Mark DeRosa, who was grittily added to this team to add to its grit quotient, provides needed grit.

The weak link to this point has been manager Davey Johnson, who appears to have not seen a baseball game since 1986. I'm not sure he's aware that you need to get relievers up in the bullpen before bringing them into a game. Best case scenario for the U.S. would be a "family emergency" that drew Davey away from the team for a few days. Bingo! Barry Larkin, you can't possibly be any worse.

As for the rest of these squads, let's just say the Americans will have to earn it. Venezuela and Korea are deep and dangerous. Mexico could beat anyone, but they're most likely doomed outside their home stadium. Cuba is, as always, a mystery. They're loaded with amazing 45-year-old communist ballplayers you've never seen before. Japan, the defending champs, are the grand masters of the international game. They pitch, field, and situationally hit with precision and economy and a five-star crash test rating.

As awesome as the Japanese appear, however, I'm convinced that the supreme overlords of the World Baseball Classic are the diamond titans from Puerto Rico. Look at this roster. LOOK AT IT! Okay, perhaps it's only mesmerizing for a true Latino baseball geek, but trust me. They're stacked. Unlike the vanquished Dominicans, however, these cats actually play together as a team. Bernie Williams is there, for Pete's sake, and he's retired from the game. Pudge Rodriguez doesn't even have a job and he is mashing. They're loving this tournament, and I'd be pretty surprised if they didn't take it.

WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO THE DOMINICAN REPUBLIC?

I've heard it called a fluke, and I've heard it said that it's the reason this tournament is an illegitimate joke. The DR dropped not one but two games to the Netherlands in Round One and they're out. It's about as wacky and stunning a development as you could concoct on a bucketful of psillocybin mushrooms, and it really happened. I'm here to say it was not a fluke, and that no one is to blame but the Dominican players--not the tournament, not the format, not the venue.

The DR has the greatest collection of superstar baseball talent on Earth, even missing A-Rod, Pujols and Manny. There are 20 future All-Star selections on that roster, and at least two or three guys who are headed to Cooperstown someday. They laid a massive egg in the first game against the Dutch, allowing three unearned runs in the first and committing catastrophic baserunning blunders late. Still, after a rout of Panama, they were in position to avenge that boner and make the quarters, yet they failed to score a single run for 10 innings. After capitalizing on a Dutch defensive miscue in the 11th, the combination of Carlos Marmol's hanging sliders and Willy Aybar's hands of stone handed the Netherlands a second win on a plate. Embarrassing. Holland can't stay around very long (they can't score), but it's a great story. Hell, this guy's their pitching coach:

WHAT'S NEXT?

Netherlands-Venezuela starts the second round tomorrow at 11 am Mountain on MLB Network, followed by United States-Puerto Rico at 6. On Sunday, those same times see Japan and Cuba in a 2006 final rematch on ESPN2, followed by Mexico and Korea.

And after that, double elimination chaos. Good luck keeping up.

SHIT I JUST DON'T GET

Puerto Rico is not a country.

Half of the Caribbean is crazy about baseball: Cuba, Mexico, Puerto Rico, Panama, Venezuela and the Dutch Antilles. The rest is oblivious: Jamaica, Costa Rica, Colombia, Brazil, Belize, Bahamas, Haiti. I was in Costa Rica for my honeymoon and wanted to watch the All-Star Game, and no one in that country has ever heard of baseball. The island of Hispaniola is half Dominican Republic, perhaps the most densely-concentrated baseball factory ever, and half Haiti, where three MLB players have been born in history. Weird.

Seriously, LaTroy Hawkins?
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An Open Letter To The National Baseball Team Of The United States Of America

Gentlemen,

In two hours you will step onto a hostile field in a foreign land to battle a foe that opposes every thing this great country stands for. The nation of Canada is our enemy, an enemy no less vial vile than the jihadists of Bin Laden, the stormtroopers of Hitler, the redcoats of Cornwallis. These mopes, dressed as innocent ballplayers garnished with maple leaves (not leafs, you illiterate colonists) are enemy combatants that deserve no quarter. Bury them as if our way of life depended on it.

American citizens may find the U.S.-Canada game from the World Baseball Classic at high noon Mountain time on the four-letter network. Watch it if you wish, but remember that even if you're doing something else our very democracy is at stake. Should our boys in red, white and blue fail once again to defeat these bucktoothed ingrates of the Yukon, our fragile republic is in jeopardy. We may as well give up and adopt the Canucks' standards: sodomy, socialism, blended whiskey.

I, for one, refuse to bend to these rebels without a bloody fight.

So then, American team, I leave you with the words of General Dwight David Eisenhower on the eve of the invasion of Normandy Beach:

Soldiers, Sailors and Airmen of the Allied Expeditionary Force!

You are about to embark upon the Great Crusade, toward which we have
striven these many months. The eyes of the world are upon you. The
hopes and prayers of liberty-loving people everywhere march with you.
In company with our brave Allies and brothers-in-arms on
other Fronts, you will bring about the destruction of the German Canadian war
machine, the elimination of Nazi ham/bacon tyranny over the oppressed peoples of
Europe North America, and security for ourselves in a free world.

Your task will not be an easy one. Your enemy is well trained, well
equipped and battle hardened. He will fight savagely.

Our air offensive has seriously reduced their
strength in the air and their capacity to wage war on the ground. Our Home
Fronts have given us an overwhelming superiority in weapons and munitions
of war, and placed at our disposal great reserves of trained fighting men.
The tide has turned! The free men of the world are marching together to
Victory!

I have full confidence in your courage and devotion to duty and skill in
battle. We will accept nothing less than full Victory!

Good luck! And let us beseech the blessing of Almighty God upon this great
and noble undertaking.

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