A Thursday Threesome of Stooge-nificence

Couple quick bites on the quarterback situation due west of Limon, Colorado. Not sure if much of this is news, but I found it relatively jaw-dropping.

I'll not attempt to out wordsmith my Colorado colleagues with regard to the seemingly never-ending Jay Cutler situation, but there are a few scrap heaps I'll throw in. Like this one:

"'Cutler is one of those young guns out there that brings great name recognition from the get-go...But I don't think football-wise it would add that much...I believe Jay Cutler is one of the top 12 quarterbacks in the NFL, but I would not put him in the top eight. He has a lot more to prove.'

Dilfer's concern — and one area he doesn't give Cutler an edge over Sage Rosenfels or Tarvaris Jackson — is managing key downs."

I have two thoughts on this and they are these: 1) I always appreciated Trent Dilfer solely for the fact that the Baltimore Ravens won a Super Bowl with a guy like Dilfer under center. It somehow ties to the sense of fleeting hope Kansas City fans had around 2000, when the Schottenheimer regime had ended, Gunther Cunningham was coach, and the Gannon-Grbacle was still a rotten taste in the mouth. It spoke to me and said, "See? You can win without an elite quarterback." At the time, I'd managed to block out the other 417 voices screaming "Holy Fuck -- We are going to suck forever!" 2) I don't intend to question, per se, Dilfer's playing ability. I'm not a professional athlete, and I've never inhabited his body, but I will say that in his effort here to make what I consider a decent point or two, he has officially placed himself in the Duh Seat for not giving Cutler an edge over Tarvaris Jackson or Sage Rosenfels.

I don't care if we're talking third-down play or drug purchasing; I'm sure he does a better job at most anything than those two clowns.

Oh, Mark Kiszla. How do you still have a job?

"Happy trails, Jay Cutler. Have a nice life. Here are three quarterbacks who could make the Broncos a better football team when you're gone:

1) Matthew Stafford, Georgia Bulldogs

2) Brady Quinn, Cleveland Browns

3) Tony Romo, Dallas Cowboys"

Hasn't everyone been saying that this year's crop of QBs is less than impressive? Isn't Cutler already an improvement since he's got experience and knows the system? Didn't you watch that thriller (Editor's Note: Do not take the black glove out, Brandon.) of a game between the Browns and the Broncos? Didn't Cutler get the edge in that dual? Didn't Quinn wind up on the bench again later? On Rome today, there was mention of Tony Romo being more interested in being a celebrity than a winning quarterback. I won't say I agree because part of me thinks that he media wants Tony Romo to be a celebrity just because his pal Peter Goezinya has been inside Jessica Simpson's garage. His team, however, the one with an oft-impressive roster, has come up short in big situations.

And Woody Paige, you worthless vile of simmering ejaculation. I won't even honor your post with a blockquote, but way to have six exclamation points in you opening 'graph. Billy Shakespeare? Pigeon Valley? Why don't you go hang out on a couple of terrible ESPN shows for a few years, and then come crawling back to Denver. Oh, wait...


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Friday Evening Fracas: Aloha, Mr. Hand

Honestly, I don't have a clue what it was that made my inner cerebral workings channel Jeff Spicoli. It just happened. It's Friday. The wife's havin' some girls over, and I can mentally telepath the drunken debauchery that's just around the corner. So, maybe it's the hall pass I've given myself for the evening. Maybe it has something to do with the giant weekend of laying on the couch that I'm envisioning. Maybe it's because when "Fast Times At Ridgemont High" came out, print journalism was a humongous wave from which us unofficial reporters of unofficial news wanted to hang 10. Whatever. At least there are many other things of importance on which to touch, or whom to touch, or -- eh, fuck it...

First and foremost, we should examine exactly how Denver Broncos Head Coach Mosh McDanahan wants to win this season by giving his opponents AIDS. Yeah. You read that right. Not "that dormant, Magic Johnson half-AIDS. I’m talking real Eazy-E AIDS. POWER AIDS." I know. Pretty jacked up. Read the details here.

Sometimes, when intelligence gets word of such ploys, that means it's time to stage an offensive. Or counter with a defensive. Either way, you've got to get some soldiers on the move. A solider like Lieutenant Winslow.

A few other soldiers have been in the news in recent weeks. They go by the names of Sidney Crosby and Alexander Ovechkin. Apparently, they don't like each other. Some folks, including Ovechkin, have repeatedly alleged that Crosby is a whining little bitch of a smack-talker, a cheap-shot artist. I'm not saying that. Folks are. Hell, even Rome did a bit on it on Monday. I couldn't tell you. What I can tell you is that the ability and talent of Ovechkin is pretty phenomenal. I mean,



get a turnover, round that corner at full steam, get knocked to your ass, and still score a goal. That's impressive.

InGameNow might argue that the opposite of impressive is shitty. They also might argue that shitty would be a good word to describe former Chicago Bears quarterback Rex Grossman. And then, they just might have 10 different examples of said shittiness.

You know what's shitty, though? I'll tell you: Two dudes that you really like talking about something that pisses you right the hell off. No, no. I'm not talking about Cecil and Old No. 7's weekly Bronkkake. Although that does irritate my most inner nerve. What I'm talking about is Ice Cube and Snoop Dogg -- even if it's just a simple mention -- discussing the notion of retiring Kobe Bryant's jersey now.



Dudes be trippin'. Really, though. I be trippin', too. Know why? The Iron Triangle knows a man doin' some cold, hard time. Like, a sliver more than a decade's worth. He recently wrote to me and asked me to send him some of our favorite posts since the day the House of Georges was coined. So we put our heads together, and came up with a few. Thing is, he'll miss out on all the great links. Both of these concepts should make it click with you that the man has been given zero Internet rights in prison. This, I assumed, was how it went across the board. Apparently, if you're a stand-up guy, a real community pillar, like say, Maurice Clarett, those rights are a bit broader.

And with that, I'll end with a sentiment that Seven has voiced before, and that is this: To anyone who ever thought it was a good idea to disable the "embed" function in a YouTube clip: Fuck off and die. Wait, what? You've got a good reason for doing so? No, really. Fuck off. And. Die. I wanted to end this post with this, and now I can't, you cheetoh-stained, shit dick.

Have a lovely weekend, y'all.
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Historically Speaking: 2-27-09

The weeks are flying by here in late February. It's free-agency time in the NFL, and St. Pat's is almost here, which means the House of Georges is about to turn two. Now, we got off the ground shortly after sites like With Leather and Kissing Suzy Kolber did, and though we're just a smidge behind them in the popularity standings, we still like to think we kick a ton of ass. Speaking of ass-kicking, get out there this weekend, get good and drunk, and break some shit, all in the name of print journalism. Today, the esteemed Rocky Mountain News will quietly close its doors after a fine, fine run of 150 years servicing Denver and the Front Range. The sheek tabloid-style, Pulitzer Prize-winning paper leaves the mile-high city with only The Denver Post in circulation. It also leaves our beloved Cecil out of work. Here's to print journalism, and to Cecil.

* Today in 1908, Major League Baseball introduced the sacrifice-fly rule. It was a short-lived rule, as the league repealed it, re-instated it, then oversaw changes to the rule numerous times prior to its permanent acceptance some 45 years later.

* Four years later, the New York Yankees announced that they would be wearing pinstripes on their uniforms.

* The year was 1959. The event was an NBA game between the Boston Celtics and the Minneapolis Lakers. Highlights included Bob Cousy's (then) record 28 assists, and the final score: a Celtics' victory by the mark of 173-139.

* The United States Olympic Hockey team defeated the USSR 3-2 on their way to gold in 1960.

* Finally, in 1992, Tiger Woods became the youngest PGA golfer in 35 years at the ripe old age of 16.

And your Sports Illustrated quote of the day came from the mouth of...



... former NBA referee Earl Strom, who, in 1982, had this to say about Elvin Hayes breaking the NBA record for career fouls: "I felt like stopping the game and giving him my whistle."
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I love the Smell of Headlines in the Morning

For some reason, the Rocky Mountain News has decided to feature a soft-focus personality piece on the cover of every Sports section. Why, I wonder? Do they feel the segment of the public that reads Sports first wants less news, more View? It's a baffler, I tells ya.

Today's feature was on George Karl and his son, Coby. Both of them have contracted and beaten cancer recently, Sunday is Father's Day--and the Rocky doesn't have a Sunday edition, so it had to run today--and it's got a nice hook. So, OK. I get it. I even understand why it's front page, though George's goblin-esque visage cracked the door on the microwave.

What I don't understand is why, during the Nuggets-Spurs series, the Rocky's sports editors did the same thing--but that time, it was a puffer on some high school swimmer. I have no issue with high school swimmers, swimmers, high schools, or high swim schoolers. But tell me that more people on the Rocky's distribution list care more about the watery goings-on of a suburban teenager than the Nuggets.

It's all part and parcel of the fall of print media. The desire to involve the public at every level; from increasing the number of personality profiles and raising their placement in the book to letting them write their own stories and post their own photos. It cheapens the craft of Journalism to so blatantly court the public's self-absorption.

My .02. Anyhow, 0-0 Cubs/Pads in the 3d. I've never liked the Padres. My aunt's family lived in San Diego for decades. My uncle and cousins were all big fans and I saw Goose Gossage get the save in my first major league game at the old Jack Murphy stadium (only one named after a journalist!), but I'll never forgive them for beating the Cubs in '84. Sun-baked bastards. Read more