Blah, blah, blah. Click the link.
You may have filled out a Frozen Four bracket. You likely filled out a Final Four bracket. I'd be willing to bet you haven't yet filled out your Best Boobs Bracket, which you can do here.
Hustle. Voting starts in five days. Oh, and um, in case you didn't know, this is NSFW.
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Long, long ago, in a time before former U.S. Vice-President invented the StubTubes, there was a thing called print media. And it was good. Strange things occurred in this time, things like the daily delivery of local newspapers to homes and businesses. Humans who did not subscribe to such rags would frequent newsstands and purchase said papers from peddlers or machines. A select number of these peddlers would also sell magazines and brochures, and the locals would purchase them. And things were good. Lastly, the work of photography was an esteemed profession, one upon which publishers of papers and magazines highly depended, as opposed to modern times, where any hack can access the photographic images and use them as they see fit.
Well, we here in the House of Georges tried desperately to cling to the modern ways of old, a battle we have, for the most part, lost. Thus yours truly saw it fit for a cleansing of all evidences of print media, a banishing if you will of the ancient form of press. And so I went, deep into the secret man-bowels of the basement, and engaged in a Kinder-esque activity of cut, paste, tape, and ultimately, destroy. It was an act that needed to happen, both for the sake of making way for these sick, futuristic times. That, and, well, my wife was gonna find this shit eventually.
We go first to an issue that arose in December of 2007,
wherein Deanna Russo was named Babe of the Month, which, in Italian means "most esteemed business person."
This edition also contained an appearance by friendly Croatian Leana Rajacic,
as well as Brazilian Sasckya Porto,
who won the award of Miss D for the holiday month.
And we wouldn't want to leave out the one and only Kim Kardashian,
who, as everyone knows is a fan of the zippy little New Orleans running back.
Double K has made red-carpet as well as sitcom waves for a number of years now,
and one might argue that she continued to do so in these pages.
The following month,
Tania Saulnier got the nod as BotM.
The feature was one in which a heavy dose of Curry was served;
I do believe Miss Adriane Curry was the protein for the main course.
It was an interesting menu, however, as dessert, apparently, was Swedish.
Sandra Nilsson Swedish.
There was also a comprehensive year-in-review aspect to the spread; it focused on earlier offerings, such as Tyrah Richard, March's chef de cuisine.
Since even a little bit of winter is too much for some, warmer months, such as that of May frequently help Seasonal-Affect Disorder sufferers turn corners in their lives.
Mayra Veronica totally relates.
In Miss Veronica's neck of the woods are friendly folks like Jennifer Leigh.
She's a connoisseur of fine weather, fine cigars, and fine, fine winnings at the poker table.
And speaking of fine weather, AJ Alexander knows a splendid spring day when she spots one.
She also, much like our president,
knows a "slick ride" when she sees one.
And we can't forget Janna Salimzyanova's contribution to May:
our appreciation of the Russian culture would embody little more than literature and
KGB were it not for her fashion forte.
May's fantastic. It really is. But you know what I like to wash down a little serving of May? A healthy dose of June.
Healthy in a sense that Layla Kayleigh might appreciate.
But we can't all be goody-goodies all the time;
for every 100 or so body-and-mind conscious choice, we should throw in a wild one, Vegas-style.
Vegas, baby. Vegas. Where the work always keeps a body movin',
and the work is also, uh, very hands-on.
We've all gotta have something to believe in,
and Juliette Frette is no exception.
Her staunch feminist beliefs, as anyone can plainly see, are quite feminine, indeed.
Finally, we check in with Jayde Nicole, who as we can see, is quite handy around the house.
There's really an endless amount of nice things you could say about her,
running from her knowledge of exotic fruits,
to her general fondness of breakfast-nook areas.
That's it for this week. We'll be sure to not see you the next time we take on such a retarded project.
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Every once in a while, we get requests for specific material here in this House of Georges, and even more seldom, we honor it. This is one of those occasions in which we deliver. Rest assured, they will not become a regular occurrence, unless of course kindly asked for in the comments. Take heed, however, for we may appear calm and benign behind our words, but under the surface, we resemble exactly what you feel when you look at this man leaning up against his pick-up truck.
Nasty, huh? Let's jump away from that poisonous image, and on to something more soothing.
Anna Kournikova
It's only fitting that we kick this post off with the poster child of hot tennis.
Feel free to take this opportunity to insert your own tagline about how Anna never won big matches,
or how she likes to bang hockey players, 'cause I ain't doin' it.
I've never had a beef with the lovely Russian.
When active in the Women's Tennis Association,
she was a pleasure to watch. And hey -- she still is.
Gabriela Sabatini
Buenos Aires, or "good airs."
It is from the Argentinan city of pleasing oxygen from which Miss Sabatini hails.
Some hailed her as the hottest tennis icon ever.
I wouldn't argue either side of that one.
Tamira Paszek
Miss Paszek calls Austria home,
home is where the heart is,
and apparently in Austria, they like to show off the door to the house.
Jelena Dokic
Blond pony tails seem to be an everlasting stamp of approval in the WTA.
Throw in some Australian out back, and it's a mega-hit.
I hear the mates around front are inviting as well,
regardless of whether they're in All Blacks,
or All Reds,
or All Whites,
or in mid-colour change.
Jelena Jankovic
From one Jelena to another,
the red-and-black theme sticks around,
reaching from the Great Barrier Reef
to Serbia.
Anna Ivanovic
Miss Ivanovic has undeniably taken over the role of the most popular racket-wielding Anna in the game.
Her game is on. Her look bares mentioning,
her style unmistakable.
If I were a ratings guy -- and I'm not --
I'd bet those numbers are higher when she's on the court.
Like the Anna before her, she seems to have embraced her iconic role in today's tennis world,
an undertaking for which we can all be thankful,
whether she's on the court or not.
Maria Sharapova
Maria has somehow fallen in between Annas I and II.
This is not to say that either Miss Sharapova or Miss Ivanovic has a better game than the other,
or that one is stronger,
or more evocative.
I posit that they are equally important.
Each has her place in the hubs of social networks, and for now,
perhaps Maria has the edge in the marketing department.
Either, I'm sure, could sell some sand to a Saudi Arabian at a ridiculously high price.
Nicole Vaidisova
And of course we musn't leave out the wonderful Czech Republic.
In addition to great hockey players and remarkable pilsners,
they give us Vaidisovals at the baseline,
and at the net.
Marta Domachowska
Marta calls Poland home, and has obvious social graces.
She's also been graced with quite an overhand,
admirable flexibility,
a keen knack for storage,
a lovely studious look,
a ripped-and-defined figure,
and a hip, welcoming smile.
Sania Mirza
Miss Mirza was thrust into the tennis world from India.
She brings her sense of Eastern sleekness to the game,
and it's visible wherever she goes, be it with racket,
or with good old-fashioned fashion.
Daniela Hantuchova
Another dynamite Czech, Daniela looks good without color,
or in her Sharapovaesque look.
She's also got a look all her own,
one that boasts an amazing physique,
and an eye for the definition of hot.
Iveta Benesova
The Czechs have taken over,
they've made their mark,
and will take no prisoners.
Their dominance in the world of hot tennis only looks up from here.
Maria Kirilenko
The Russians, however, won't give in easily.
They've got tradition in the game, and remain a force on the court,
and a sweet surprise away from it.
Ashley Harkleroad
But alas there remains at least one American.
They will not go away, ever-competitive,
downhome, seemingly innocent, and really good at one thing in particular:
Getting. Naked. Advantage: USA!
(All images -- save our mulleted friend -- courtesy of Hot Female Tennis Players)
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