If you pay any attention to the world outside of sports, you may have heard that the governor's mansion burned down in the Texas capital of Austin over the weekend. Read all about the particulars here, especially the fact that authorities suspect arson.Now here at the HoG we despise arson. There are some crimes that are cool, like embezzlement, reckless driving and mail fraud. But arson is fucking lame, man. Gutless. So we're taking it upon ourselves to solve this heinous act of malfeasance, and we have some leads. So if anyone has a connection to the current or former resident of this real-life House of George (W.), please forward them this tip. Your guilty torch, after the jump...
Does anyone know where noted Austin miscreant Cedric Benson was Sunday morning? Anyone? If so please contact law enforcement. You've got your man.
Add cool crimes: public urination, boating while intoxicated, second degree manslaughter.
ReplyDeleteYou know what else is gonna be awesome? Barack Obama gutting John McCain's candidacy like a fresh-caught Alaskan King salmon.
The niceties of the Democratic party's nomination process are over. Now we bring out the knives.
To the people who don't think our man has it in him, I say: south side Chicago politics.