Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Wednesday Whatnot: Two Prominent HoG Figures Still at Large in Cities of Wind, Angels

Yes. There are two of them. And yes, we are international bloggers of mystery. It's true. We've even posted from overseas before. We're gonna make you work for the goodies, though. Check beneath the fake grass of the jump your Easter basket for the scoop.

Oh, good. Glad you decided to join us. The first is none other than Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler, who, as you can see,

is fitting in just fine in his new town.

The second? Well, authorities are prohibiting us from putting his likeness up on the 'Tubes, but he's certainly no stranger to these parts. Sure. The cops call him "suspect A." We know him better as Humberto.

So, you're headed to the the viney-walled Wrigley for some Cubby Ball? Got a trip to the Friendly Confines in your planner? Take note. Use the buddy system. Watch your back. These men are out there, and they will, in fact, hurt you.


Cecil said...

The irony of Julia Allison--who has never done anything to warrant fame of any kind--schtupping the whiny wad of potential known as Jay Cutler is simply mind-blowing.

Even better is the fact that she probably leaked it to Page 6 herself.

Dylan said...

How can a guy be blinking at all times when the camera is clicking?

Oh I see.... a bunch of a-holes chase him around all the time and clic pics.

Its good to see the natural grieving process taking place between Citizens of Denver and Jayjams. Step two: Anger.

Cecil said...

Dude, I can almost guarantee the chick in question leaked all this on her own. Jay isn't paparazzo material.

Welcome to the Big City, kid. No more friendly locals willing to look the other way.