Wednesday, March 4, 2009

We Are Hot Chicks Wednesday: Destroying the Evidence

Long, long ago, in a time before former U.S. Vice-President invented the StubTubes, there was a thing called print media. And it was good. Strange things occurred in this time, things like the daily delivery of local newspapers to homes and businesses. Humans who did not subscribe to such rags would frequent newsstands and purchase said papers from peddlers or machines. A select number of these peddlers would also sell magazines and brochures, and the locals would purchase them. And things were good. Lastly, the work of photography was an esteemed profession, one upon which publishers of papers and magazines highly depended, as opposed to modern times, where any hack can access the photographic images and use them as they see fit.

Well, we here in the House of Georges tried desperately to cling to the modern ways of old, a battle we have, for the most part, lost. Thus yours truly saw it fit for a cleansing of all evidences of print media, a banishing if you will of the ancient form of press. And so I went, deep into the secret man-bowels of the basement, and engaged in a Kinder-esque activity of cut, paste, tape, and ultimately, destroy. It was an act that needed to happen, both for the sake of making way for these sick, futuristic times. That, and, well, my wife was gonna find this shit eventually.

We go first to an issue that arose in December of 2007,



wherein Deanna Russo was named Babe of the Month, which, in Italian means "most esteemed business person."

This edition also contained an appearance by friendly Croatian Leana Rajacic,



as well as Brazilian Sasckya Porto,



who won the award of Miss D for the holiday month.



And we wouldn't want to leave out the one and only Kim Kardashian,



who, as everyone knows is a fan of the zippy little New Orleans running back.



Double K has made red-carpet as well as sitcom waves for a number of years now,



and one might argue that she continued to do so in these pages.

The following month,



Tania Saulnier got the nod as BotM.



The feature was one in which a heavy dose of Curry was served;



I do believe Miss Adriane Curry was the protein for the main course.



It was an interesting menu, however, as dessert, apparently, was Swedish.



Sandra Nilsson Swedish.



There was also a comprehensive year-in-review aspect to the spread; it focused on earlier offerings, such as Tyrah Richard, March's chef de cuisine.

Since even a little bit of winter is too much for some, warmer months, such as that of May frequently help Seasonal-Affect Disorder sufferers turn corners in their lives.



Mayra Veronica totally relates.

In Miss Veronica's neck of the woods are friendly folks like Jennifer Leigh.



She's a connoisseur of fine weather, fine cigars, and fine, fine winnings at the poker table.

And speaking of fine weather, AJ Alexander knows a splendid spring day when she spots one.



She also, much like our president,



knows a "slick ride" when she sees one.

And we can't forget Janna Salimzyanova's contribution to May:



our appreciation of the Russian culture would embody little more than literature and
KGB were it not for her fashion forte.

May's fantastic. It really is. But you know what I like to wash down a little serving of May? A healthy dose of June.



Healthy in a sense that Layla Kayleigh might appreciate.

But we can't all be goody-goodies all the time;



for every 100 or so body-and-mind conscious choice, we should throw in a wild one, Vegas-style.



Vegas, baby. Vegas. Where the work always keeps a body movin',



and the work is also, uh, very hands-on.

We've all gotta have something to believe in,



and Juliette Frette is no exception.



Her staunch feminist beliefs, as anyone can plainly see, are quite feminine, indeed.

Finally, we check in with Jayde Nicole, who as we can see, is quite handy around the house.



There's really an endless amount of nice things you could say about her,



running from her knowledge of exotic fruits,



to her general fondness of breakfast-nook areas.

That's it for this week. We'll be sure to not see you the next time we take on such a retarded project.

4 comments:

old no. 7 said...

I like the gauzy look that comes from scanner glass smeared with Vaseline.

I also nominate the Hawaiian Punch logo for Best Nipple Substitute. Much better than little photos of Scott Pioli.

bankmeister said...

My overwhelming disappointment comes in the form of generic Windex not "beating tough stains" like Vaseline. Frauds, I tell ya'. Massive frauds.

Cecil said...

I disagree wholeheartedly.

Sincerely,

Little Photo of Scott Pioli.

Anonymous said...

Dude nice resolution but what is the point of loading such a huge picture when you've covered the interesting bits?